Where Are You?

I sat there for a while before I sent Alex a text.

N: I’m going to come over, I need to talk to you.

I didn’t wait for an answer. I knew he wasn’t going to answer me. He was ignoring me, we had a fight two days ago, and he didn’t want to talk. I got that. I’d left the conversation. I was angry, but I needed to talk to him. I needed him just like I needed air.

Margo was sitting on the couch in the waiting room, “You done?”

I grinned. “I’m going to go talk to Alex.” I said.

She smiled and stood up and we walked out of the Infirmary together. We bid a fond farewell at the elevators while I took the stairs down and ran to Alex’s apartment.

I was winded when I arrived outside Alex’s building, Joe was standing there letting a woman in with bright green dress. She glanced at me with a sneer on her lips and I gave her a bright smile. “Is Alex here?” I asked Joe the door man.

He shook his head, “No, I’ve not seen Mr. Kennedy all day.”

I sighed. “Okay. Thanks.”

I tried his other place. The fancy one, the one where his fake friend showed up. The one I wasn’t sure he had been fucking or not. It made me angry to think of her hands on Alex, so I ran. I knew he had a past, I did too, but he was mine. The memories floating to my mind, all those feelings, so many years ago that I just found. Fuck!

I slowed to a walk to calm myself, running was only making me think worse things. I calmed as I walked, took a deep breath, found all the little things I missed on a day to day basis as I walked the city. The cracks in the buildings as I passed them. The whisper of cars going by. The chatter of humans and critters in the alley.

I closed my eyes only for a second and I collided with a small thump and yelled, “Hey watch…”

My eyes popped open and I was staring down at Alex’s fake friend. She was wearing a green long coat that looked like it cost more than my whole apartment. She sat on her ass on the sidewalk where she’d fallen. I offered her my hand as any one would and she took it as I pulled her upright. “Aren’t you the gentleman?” She said and put her hand on my chest. I looked her in the eyes and she smiled brightly at me.

“Are you heading to Brent’s?” she asked.

I stared at her blankly till I realized she meant Alex. His fucking alias. I nodded. “I am.”

“He’s not there, I just came from there.” She pressed her hand harder into my chest and I had no choice but to take a step back or she’d knock me over with the pressure she exerted on my chest.

“Why were you visiting him?” I asked, even I heard the jealousy on my lips.

Her smile turned to a smirk as she took my hand with her free on and pressed it up her leg to her bare ass underneath the coat. “You thought to seduce him?”

“I was going to do more than that, pretty boy.” She sneered at me.

I laughed and pulled my hand from hers. “I doubt that. If you don’t mind.” I tried to go around her but she put a single high-heeled foot blocking my path and pressed me harder against the wall she’d pushed me against.

“You aren’t going anywhere.” her voice became even more commanding as she uttered a simple word, “Xiàjiàng.”

I dropped my eyes to the ground as she released me from her grasp. It wasn’t my command word, I didn’t have one. And I had never actually responded to the word she used. She tried to unbutton my pants and I grabbed her hands and spun her around and pressed her against the wall. “Don’t ever fucking touch me again. I am neither your or Brent’s play toy.” I spat out Alex’s alias and hurried away before she figured out I was very close to wanting to submit. Alex was gone. Alex wasn’t in his apartment – either of them. Where the fuck was he?

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