Getting Ready

I walked around the AU building trying to destress until I needed to grab a shower. So much for taking it easy before seeing Alex. On a fucking date. My heart was beating fast and I knew that I was sweating like crazy. Why did I agree?

I actually hadn’t I reminded myself. Alex left a date and a time, and only yesterday did we confirm that we were meeting up. Fuck!

My shower was hot and short as I washed away the anxiety in scalding water. I rubbed the back of my neck and felt the tattoo itching, which was silly since it was long since healed. I’d done a few fucked up things as a kid and that had been one. A tattoo when I hated needles – you could thank my dipshit roomates for that one. Fucking truth or dare!

At least I didn’t have to see it. Though the artwork was well done – Ash didn’t do anything halfway. Ash was the only transwoman I knew. He was now a she and drop dead gorgeous. I’d never met Aslen but fuck if Ashley wasn’t hot.

I was distracting myself. I could be thinking about a gorgeous set of blue eyes and a great smile. Ophelia swatted my leg from the toilet nearby. “What?” I asked.

She hissed and I looked at the watch on the counter. I was gonna be late if I didn’t get dressed soon. I ran my fingers through my hair and changed the color of the blond tips to the color of his eyes. I wore a pair of black jeans and picked the first shirt that was in the drawer and pulled it on over the scars. I wasn’t sure I wanted him to see me naked. Fuck! Dan had only wanted to have sex in the dark. He was self conscious, when he had no reason to be. Yeah he had a little flab around the stomach but he was attractive and managed to get me off plenty even if he was a little squeamish. I was alright with that. But I hasn’t been alright with the way he treated me. I wasn’t a fucking sub and I wasn’t going back to that life. I needed the lesson in life to become the man I was, but I was a bottom not a top and Dan didn’t seem to get either. He pushed too far to too many extremes. Even Kai told him off for it and my father didn’t care about my love life.

I stared into my closet and debated hoodie or just a long sleeved button down. This was a date, but we were going to a game joint – where I was probably not going to be sitting around watching – unless that was Alex’s thing. Fuck if he was like Sage I was gonna be so fucking screwed – or not screwed as the case may be.

I grabbed the black button down and pulled it over the t-shirt. I decided on my canvas Chucks and strapped the watch on that my father had given me for my second birthday. He liked to call it as it was. To him he joked I was only five. Fuck if I was only five I’d be sparking any day now and I’d be … I pushed the thoughts from my head and headed down stairs. Last thing I needed was to be freaking the fuck out. I took the stairs slowly – no running and jumping. But way too much time to think. Way too much time.

But I was still early when I made it down to the lobby. I had ten minutes to spare, and I bought two coffees… One black, and one with a cream and two sugars. A memory niggled at the edge of my thoughts but I didn’t know what it was. What was I forgetting?

I sat at his normal table and waited..

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