Dev and Dee lived several blocks away and I walked in the chilling November weather. It wasn’t bitter cold yet. But it was getting there. The leather kept me warm as I walked and drowned in the emptiness of my life.
The doorman smiled at me and waved me over. I’d been over almost everyday with food. I frowned. “Sorry date, tonight, no food for anyone. I’ll bring you back something.”
He grinned. “I’ll buzz them and tell ’em you are on your way up.”
“Thanks Joe.” I waved and headed for the stairs. I wasn’t going to add to my anxiety. The elevator was perfectly safe, but I could take the stairs and sweat less and feel better once I got there. Even that little bit of exercise helped clear my mind. I locked down my emotions and my thoughts as I made my way to their floor.
Dev and Dee lived with Dev’s band mates. I’d yet to hear them play anything. Dev actually had a guitar in Sage’s basement now. It was acoustic and he liked to play for the boys. I’d stood at the top of the stairs and listened while he sang kid songs with Drake. It was cute. Everyone was so close already and I still felt a little left out. I understand I’m the reason they are close. But I missed it all. I missed all the growing together. And I was struggling to find my place in all of it. I could step aside and no one would miss me. I pushed away the thoughts as I knocked on the door. I had a key, I could just walk in, but this was a date, I was going to play it by the books. A real date. One where I was picking the girl up. But she was taking me out. It was almost proper.
Jimmy answered the door with a cigarette in his hand. It was unlit. “Hey, Nox. Just going out for a smoke. Dee’s still getting ready. Why didn’t you use your key? And hey why aren’t you bringing us dinner?”
I smiled. “Sage ordered pizza. Sorry. Date,” I said as he stepped passed me without any shoes on. “It’s cold outside, you might want shoes.”
He looked down and shrugged. “It’ll be alright.”
I shook my head. “Alright.” I stepped into their apartment. It could have spacious except the living space was also Jimmy’s makeshift bedroom, and their studio for practicing their music. Instruaments were scattered everywhere. Dev’s weren’t they were all in his room. Which is where I headed.
I knocked and Dev stuck his head out and smiled at me. He pushed me backwards. “She says you can’t come in. So I get you out here.”
He frowned at me and ran his fingers down my jawline. “Let me in.”
I closed my eyes and let my shields down a little and Dev jumped inside. It didn’t take much, we had so many magical and metaphysical connections between the two of us. He pressed a kiss to my lips and thought, “Stop hiding from us. We can help.”
I thought back. “You can’t help the boredom of my mundane existance, Dev. I have to deal with it.”
Dev took my hand and dragged me into the kitchen and handed me a cup of coffee. “I know we don’t understand. But we are here. Talk to us.”
I sighed. “It makes you feel bad that I’m not happy.”
“What would make you happy?” He asked with a smirk on his lips. “Except ….” He didn’t say what he was thinking as he pressed it into my mind with another kiss.
I hummmed in agreement. I smiled and wrapped my arms around Dev. Of all the changes in my life I didn’t regret adding him and Dee to our lives. I felt left out, but I didn’t regret it.
Dev smiled and pressed another kiss to my lips. “We all love you Nox.”
“You say it so casually.” I grinned at him.
“I do. Love you that is.”
I nodded. “I know. And I love you. I love Dee. I don’t regret my choices. At least on the rational level.”
Dev laughed. “And you are never rational. Always with those messed up brain waves.” He poked me as the bedroom door opened and Dee walked out. He turned and smiled and I couldn’t help the grin that splayed on my lips. Dee’s hair was pulled up into a bun, she had fans dangling from her ears that matched the red of her dress. It was tight in all the right places and billowed to the ground so when she spun on the dancefloor it would get nice lift. And knowing Dee there was nothing underneath the dress. No bar, no panties and no pantyhose. Dee loved to make you want her with very thin clothes.
Dee joined the both of us. She pressed a soft kiss to Dev’s lips and then did the same for me. Eddie who had been sitting on the couch groaned. “I don’t want to watch this. Get a room!”
Dev threw an apple at Eddie. “They are leaving soon.”
I smiled at Dev. “Why don’t you come to Sage’s after work?”
Dev smiled and looked at Dee she shrugged. “Alright. I’ll call Sage make sure he doesn’t have plans.”
“You know he doesn’t care. He’d have you guys move in if we had room.”
Dee laughed. “What you don’t think the four of us could share one closet? I mean you don’t have any clothes to speak of and the other two could easily scrunch into a quarter of the closet.”
Dev shoved us away from the kitchen. “Go before you give her more ideas.”
I hooked Dev in my arms and kissed him with a little more vigor than Dee had given us. I couldn’t help the small noise I made when we parted. Dev laughed. “So easy pretty boy.”
“Only for you lover.” I grinned at him and pressed a quick kiss to his temple. “See you later tonight.”
“Have fun.” Dev leveled a finger at Dee. “Don’t press him.”
“What?” She asked innocently as she took my hand and grabbed her shawl from the hook. and I grabbed the door. She was going to freeze. Thankfully I could easy handle that.