My room was empty. The bed was lumpy and I truly missed Sage. And Dev. Fuck that man was becoming ingrained in my life as much as Sage had. Why? I kept asking myself. This was Sage’s thing. He wanted more. Needed more. I didn’t. I just needed Sage, yet Dev – there was just something about him. I was drawn to him and he was drawn to me.
And then there was Dee. I didn’t even know her. Sage liked her. She was Dev’s live in girlfriend – had been for years. So why was Dev taking up my brain?
I didn’t want to overthink things. Sage wanted to watch. I needed to be available for that. But yet I knew Dev was becoming more than just someone who we had sex with. I needed to talk to Sage.
I lay down in my bed and I tried to sleep. But it wasn’t working. Even thinking of Dev was making things worse. Our last dream together had been cut short last night. My body was still aching from the excitement. I wanted more. More Dev. More sex. Fuck I hadn’t had sex in over two weeks. Granted I didn’t care during those two weeks but fuck! And now I was in some mental facility taking fucking medication that was trying to kill me – or at least that’s what my brain kept saying. Twice a day that little blue pill was given to me. And twice a day it felt like I was suffocating for a few minor seconds and then it was gone, like it never happened.
I blinked and in that moment I must have drifted to sleep. I saw the tree standing before me in that bizzare landscape. The sun and the stars still shining together against the autumn backdrop of trees. Yet my tree was barren. I ran my fingers over the rough bark and smiled. The eyes were closed and it looked peiceful. Those eyes … And that’s when memories flooded into my brain and my eyes shot open.
I sat up and looked at the desk on the far wall. My notebook was there spiral free but all together. Dorian was a wonderful man, I could kiss him. I wouldn’t because people would talk, but the sentiment was there. I flipped to the last page of the notebook where I always drew the one image that always seemed to call to me. The tree stood in the middle of the page. There were no stars or sun in the background but I could see the images in my head clear as day. The three eyes in a triangle. Three loves of my life. Each looking back at me.
Another memory drifted forward eyes around me. Images floating through the haze of the drugs I was given. I had always thought it strange that the blue eyes were different colored. I always thought they were symbolic of something and now I knew. Fuck! I hated prophecy and fate and destiny. I wasn’t meant for this. If I was meant for this it meant some higer fucking being beleived I needed to be tortured.
I could feel the fire heating the air around me in my anger. I brought it all together and let it out therough my upturned hand. A jet of fire went up towards the ceiling stopped by a dome of air. The fire curled around and the room grew hot. I took a deep breath and focused on the flames, on venting my anger through the inferno. I needed to get out of her. I was going to go crazy in this place.