Losing Myself

Nox finished eating before I did and was up cleaning up the mess he’d made. Which in retrospect wasn’t that big of a mess since he did the dishes as he went. There was very little to do . I could do this. “You cooked. I can clean up.”

He nodded. “I know you can. But if it’s not taken care of it’ll drive me nuts. The whole change thing, the patterns mess up cause it’s outta order. I’ll be better with it cleaned up, now instead of later.”

I sighed, “You really are a pain in the ass.” I got up and collected my dishes and took them to the sink to start the dishwasher.

“Not yet.” He grinned at me at me as he hip checked me and started washing the dishes by hand. I don’t think I’d ever done that. Maybe once as a kid.

“Go put the food away. I’ll have it later.” I ordered. I could wash dishes, or do it my way anyway.

He didn’t seem to mind, “Yes, sir,” he said as he pressed a kiss to my temple and then started putting everything in separate bowls.

I was going to have to wash all that. “You could have put it all in one thing.”

“No way. Then the pasta drinks all the pesto sauce. And the chicken gets all mushy. This way you can just pop the chicken in the oven for ten and warm and melt the cheese again. You can microwave the pasta and the pesto together but I’d just do the pasta and keep the pesto cold, maybe mix in some more olive oil to thin it out a little.”

I dried my hands. “I’m going to go with my first statement. You are a pain in the ass.”

He smirked. “And I’m still going with, not yet.”

His words went straight to my cock. I groaned, “Alright, come on. Tour first and then I want dessert.”

Nox laughed, “Hey, I’m not a piece of meat.”

I ran my eyes over his body and grabbed his hoodie zipper and let it fall from his shoulders when I pushed it off his shoulders. “I’ll be the judge of that.” The idea that his hoodie was on the floor would bug him so I kicked it up into my hand and tossed it to the couch so he’d be less prone to freaking out. His thoughts were one tracked again. He was thinking about all the things he wanted to do with me. I was the piece of meat and it was making me hard. I growled, “Come on.” I stumbled away and grabbed my guitar on the way out. “This way.”

I pointed to the spare bedroom that was pretty much empty except for a desk. “That’s the spare bedroom I use for an office.” I gripped the guitar with my other hand and pointed to the other end. “The only bathroom is down this way.” We walked that way. I actually showed him this room. And he seemed to like it. I hoped we’d be checking it out later.

I pushed opened my bedroom door and I stepped inside to put the guitar on it’s stand in the corner of the room. It wasn’t much, but it was all mine. “This is my room.” I saw its state of disarray, my unmade bed and the room itself again and sighed. “I wasn’t expecting guests.”

He shrugged. “It doesn’t bother me. You leave it a mess all the time so it looks fine.”

“But you make yours.” I tried to understand.

“But I’ve always made mine. It was a rule growing up, kinda like boot camp and the military.”

I nodded, “Okay, you sure?” I asked to make one last final check. I’d make it if I knew he was coming over.

He nodded and sat down on the bed. “Yeah, no need to worry about making it messier.” He grinned at me, “I assume that is part of the goal?”

I shook my head and pulled him off the bed and tossed the blankets to the floor on the other side of the room then flopped down on the top of the bed face first. “I was serious, my neck hurts now.”

“So dramatic.” He said behind me as he tugged at my t-shirt. “If you want a proper back rub you need to lose the shirt.”

I rolled over and looked up at him and I knew he liked the view. I smirked at him. He was so fucking easy. I sat up and he pulled the shirt over over my head. As I tossed the shirt across the room into the corner I reached around him and grabbed his phone. “I’m going to put this on Do Not Disturbed.” I watched his face and listened to his reaction and so far nothing seemed wrong, “You’re alarms should still come through.” I said confidently.

He nodded, “I know. I use it at night.”

I smiled. “This okay?” I set his phone on the nightstand and then set my own in the same mode next to it. He nodded at me. “Good now you are all mine.”

Nox whispered, “I was already all yours.”

I shook my head, “No you would have left if someone told you something had happened on your big case.”

He shrugged. “You’ll never know now – will you?” He shoved me and I sat down on the bed. He spun his finger to tell me he wanted to get started and I gladly obliged him.

“Bossy, I swear.” I kicked off my shoes and I put my cheek on my crossed hands with closed eyes. I was going to to enjoy this. “The mess isn’t gonna make you agitated will it?”

“I’ll let you know when things start getting too much, alright? You don’t have to keep asking.”

I rolled on to my side. “I don’t want to freak you out at all Nox, Not even a little. I want this to go well.” I wanted him to stay with me, here outside of everything else. Fuck what was I doing?

Nox was confident, “It’s going great.” It felt odd him being the one who knew things would be alright. “I’ll let you know when it gets too much. I promise. I’m not fragile.” Could a fooled me.

I laid back down with a sigh and the words slipped out of my mouth. Nox didn’t say anything in response as he sat on my ass and started rubbing his hands on my back. They felt warm. I fucking melted under his touch. I bit my lip to keep from making too many unwanted noises as he kneaded the knots I hadn’t really known where there.

Nox whispered as his hot hands pressed through my back and it went straight to my cock. “There has just been a lot of stress the past few days. I’m not usually quite so volatile. You make me nervous among other things.”

“Why do I make you nervous?” I sounded far away. His fingers were making me sleepy.

“I don’t date. I don’t take guys numbers and keep them, much less call them back. I haven’t been with a guy in a few years. It’s just all new and yet you make me feel safe and like I’ve done this a thousand times before. I know it sounds crazy but you smell and feel like home.”

I didn’t know how to respond to that so I shut up and Nox expertly worked my back until I fell asleep.

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