• Not What I Bargained For

    Not What I Bargained For

    Ryan moved to the kitchen. “You hungry?”

    “Not really, Sage made me eat before I got here.”

    “Good kid,” Ant said.

    “Your girl leave alright?”

    Ant chuckled, “She will leave after Allison brings her a bite to eat.”

    “You aren’t feeding her?”

    “Allison is a better at it,” Ryan said. “Bre is used to business as usual.”

    “I didn’t think he, you, fed on the same person? At least thats what I understood.”

    “I don’t have a herd like my mother. I do have regulars who understand my desires and needs.”

    “Desires and needs. I like that. I need to make a few calls, that alright?”

    “Tell me first, then you can make your calls.”

    “Sage got some information from the Infirmary. They are giving Nox lethal doses of nepenthe.”

    The look on Ant’s face was angry but his words were not. “That explains the way I feel. Make your calls. We’ll meet in the conference room on the 50th floor in an hour. I will call Allison to get mother here, and do you want me to talk to Dom?”

    “He’s?”

    Ryan laughed. “He’s the pack leader for the Manhattan clan.”

    “Uh, no. I want to do that but through Nox’s channels. He has a guy…” I said hoping they’d help me out.

    Ant nodded, “Call Liam, do it right. That’s good. I will send word to Desmond and Marshall but the Creed won’t get involved.”

    All these names and I was going to get lost. There was a lot going on in this city Nox didn’t tell me about. Maybe I just didn’t listen? Or listen well enough.

    I gave Liam a call, I remembered the weaselly looking wolf but I doubt he’d remember me. He answered quickly, “What?”

    “Is that how you answer the call when Nox calls you?”

    “What’s it to you? Who the fuck are you?” He growled, literally growled at me.

    “My name is Alex Kennedy, we met once, with your wonder boy. I need to speak to your boss, about something concerning Nox. It’s highly important. I’m putting together a meeting with Anthony Giovanni and some others to discuss it. I would really appreciate it if he were in attendance. In one hour in the conference room on the 50th floor of the Night Life building.”

    “What’s up with Nox?” I could hear the concern in his voice.

    “That’s on a need to know basis right now. Please, it’s important, I wouldn’t be calling, and I sure as fuck wouldn’t be calling his guy if I didn’t want to do this the right way. I need him to hear me out.”

    “I’ll make sure he’s there,” the wolf said. Just dropping his name got things done.

    Ryan laughed, “It wasn’t just that.”

    “What?” I asked looking at the boy in the kitchen of their dojo. Her really didn’t look more than eighteen but I knew he was hundreds of years old.

    “It’s not just dropping Nox’s name that gets things done. Most of the higher up people know your name. Mors Praetors ‘targets’ are usually well known. The fact that you were his target for another reason doesn’t escape them.”

    I couldn’t wrap my head around it. “Do you have vampire powers or something?”

    Ryan smirked. “Or something. Cari is down the hall, her telepathic ability is minimal, but sometimes when the signal is strong she picks it up and I hear it.” He smiled and pushed a plate of pancakes across the bar. “I know you said you weren’t hungry.”

    “Do you have ice-cream?”

    Ryan chuckled and went to the freezer and pulled out a pint. “Always. \ If you prefer there’s chocolate in there, but that’s usually reserved for meltdowns.”

    “Tell me Ant built this room for him?”

    Ant came back into the room. “Actually, I built it for Ryan and I, but it’s currently stocked for Nox.”

    “Did you get a hold of Dom’s guy?”

    “He said he’ll make sure he’s there in an hour.”

    “Who else do you want to call?”

    “I need to call Adrian back.”

    “Allison can do it. Anyone else?”

    “Who ever you think needs to know and whoever might help,” I said and sat down at the bar staring at the pancake and ice-cream.

    Ant walked past me and put his hand my shoulder. “Nox is fine.”

    “You said that drug could kill a human.”

    Ant laughed. “It can. Nox isn’t exactly human. I feel lost in my own head. That’s why you can’t get to him, he’s lost. I can’t explain it.”

    “Show me.”

    The smile from the vampires lips vanished and the room felt colder. “That’s not a good idea.”

    “Just show me. Ant, if I can feel it maybe I can reach him. I feel him calling me.”

    Ant looked at me like he was boring holes in my skin trying to find something. “You can’t…” he sighed. “Fine.”

    “What can’t I do?”

    Ant shook his head. “Nothing. It wasn’t you can’t, it’s that I can’t stop you.”

    “What can’t you stop me from doing?” I asked curious what had the vampire afraid of me.

    “Just do it Alex. You’ll understand.”

    Ant let his shields down and I felt an overwhelming feeling of lust and desire and when I stepped into his head, it was almost literal. I could see and feel and I was him. This was something that had never happened before. Anthony Giovanni was an open book. It reminded me of Nox. The thought alone almost had me jumping out of his head. But there was a steady hand on my shoulder in the real world. Ryan whispered, “Just find the bond, you’ll know it when you find it.”

    It wasn’t a mess in here like Nox’s head. It was neat and orderly and it was organized. Everything Nox wasn’t. The connection was a thin red line like in the dream world, why I was seeing this instead of reading his thoughts I didn’t know. There was an echo I thought I understood, ‘because you are what you are.’ I didn’t understand, what was I?

    But I felt around their connection and it was strong, and it felt like Nox was in a fog, lost in the mist. It wasn’t going to help me. I already knew the mist but maybe next time I could find that bond since I can’t see my own.

    I left his mind, I felt strangely alone even with Ryan’s hand steadying me. “What were you afraid of?”

    But a voice from the door answered me, “He was afraid you’d see truths in the connections.”

    “I only saw neat and orderly and his connection to Nox.”

    The man standing in the doorway was tall but gaunt. He wasn’t very attractive yet he drew my eye too him. “Ant’s afraid you’ll figure out that other things happened.”

    “What other things?”

    Ryan stepped back around the counter to the kitchen side. “This is Nick. He’s an empath but like you he sees the connections others have.”

    “The bond between the two of you is weak, new, but integral.”

    “What bond?”

    Ant sighed, “Nick, shut up and go back to your room. I can tell him.”

    “Tell me what?”

    “Do you believe in soul mates?”

    I opened my mouth to say no, but I closed it quickly before just looking at the vampire. I wasn’t sure I liked where this is going.

    “You do. Good. Souls like magic is just energy, we all go back to the same place to be ‘reborn’ again and again, though not all souls are made from the same energy as before. They take a little bit of this, and a little bit of that and make a new soul, but soul energy is uniquely tied to itself. And those like souls despite being separated are what we refer to as soul mates. The more soul energy a person has the stronger the connection. I met a woman once, she was the love of my life. I lost her, vowed to find her. Researched soul mates, learned how to find her generation after generation. I haven’t found her again since her last death. Instead I found Nox, and you. You two are soul mates.”

    I didn’t even have to nod he knew the answer but it hadn’t been a question either. “Strong coming into power connection if Nox tells me right. But the moment I met him I knew he possessed a piece of my love. And then I met you.”

    “Don’t fucking tell me…”

    Ant laughed. “You possess a piece as well. Naturally I’m drawn to you and him. Which is why I can read you and why when I let you in you saw me the way you did If we were to forge a bond like the one I share with Nox, and you and he to form another, the ramifications are unsettling.”

    Ryan shook his head. “It’s called a triumvirate of power. It’s a thing of legend and even that legend is so old no one has ever seen one. And Nox can’t know.”

    “Why the fuck not? Why are you telling me?”

    Ant laughed. “If Nox thinks this is part of destiny he’ll rebel against it, reject it out right. Free will and all, but he’s more than just a simple boy. Tell me you don’t feel it. The book, the shit he lives through, we don’t understand it, we aren’t supposed to. There are prophecies, and he fills each one of them as if he knows it’s written. If he knew he’d rebel.”

    “And this triumvirate of power do you want it to happen?”

    “That’s not for me to decide.”

    “Nox… So you love him?”

    “Not like you think,” Ant said. “He’s my master now. I’m drawn to him, but I’m not inclined to sleep with him. Just be the friend he needs. It’s not the first time she’s been a man. But the first she’s split between two.”

    “Did you love him then?” I asked.

    Ant laughed. “Not in the way you think. We were friends, good ones, but there was no sex between us, no touching, nothing more than a great friendship.”

    “You know that’s kinda sad.”

    “It is. But it is what it is. I’m glad it’s Nox. And I’m sure I’ll be glad to know you too.”

    Holy fuck that was a lot to take in.

  • Into the Vampire Den

    Into the Vampire Den

    I finished eating with Sage opposite me. I’d never actually talked to the hacker, only worked with him. I hated that the more I talked to him, the more I saw why Nox was his friend, and how they really had grown up together in a world where being different was shunned. I knew all about that too, but my experience was less dramatic than theirs because no one knew I was different.

    Sage grew up a human in a wolf pack. Nox a human in the Venatori world I grew up a telepath in the human world. And yet the experiences we shared weren’t the same, but we got along. Made you wonder how the rest of the world survived. What if they’d known about the supernatural. Humans who could talk to computers, or read your mind. Men and women who could do magic. Vampires, werewolves. I wondered if there were zombies.

    My phone pinged when Sage sent me the contacts. I grinned at him. “Happy doing business with you. I’ll call when I have details.”

    Sage nodded, “Hey Alex?” I turned to look back at him after I’d gotten up. “If you see Nox in the dream, tell him we are all here waiting, we love him.”

    I nodded. “Sure thing, Sage. I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear that.” And for some odd reason I knew that was the truth. He hated being alone. I was learning that. He wanted to be held and touched because he was afraid of being alone. Or unloved, or something. He was such a basket case sometimes. I guess that made him my basket case.

    I flipped through all the new contacts in my personal phone. I recognized some of them, but there were a ton I did not. It wasn’t a long list. I knew Nox went through some proper channels in some places, but I didn’t know them. I knew Ant, and I knew the name of the Lone Wolf Pack because I hated that name probably as much as I had thought I hated Ant’s. I hit the call button next to Adrian’s name, and I took a deep breath. What the fuck was I doing?

    A very masculine voice answered, “Hello?”

    “Hi. I’m a friend of Nox’s.”

    “Alex?”

    “Does everyone fucking know who I am?”

    “You’ve met Nox? You know he doesn’t shut up. And you are his favorite topic.”

    I sighed. “Yes, okay. Nox is in trouble, and I’m looking for help in getting him out of the AU building.”

    “Really? What happened?”

    I relayed the story. The nightmare, the demon possession, the jumping, and the information my hacker found. I didn’t know who knew the identity of The Wicked Truth, and I wasn’t about to out one of Nox’s best friends.

    “What did you have in mind?” Adrian asked.

    “I’m going to go wake up the son, the prince of fucking darkness, and I’ll explain it all when everyone gets there.”

    Adrian interrupted me with laughter. “I bet he just loves that nickname.”

    “I don’t think he knows it,” I said. “I’m going there now, I’m almost to the door.”

    “You’re just going to waltz into the Night Life building unannounced?”

    “Yeah? Why not? Nox does it all the time.”

    “You are not Mors Praetor either.”

    I shrugged. “Whatever, I’m going to see Ant not his mother. I don’t want to meet that scary bitch.”

    Adrian laughed. “If you survive, give me a call and I’ll meet you there. Inside the building is vamp territory and I’d rather not start a war my people can’t win, and without Nox to keep the peace that’s dangerous.”

    “He’s really that important?” I asked – really hearing it for the first time from someone other than his friends. Though Adrian was still a friend.

    “He really is. His own people don’t even know how critical he is. Fuck I’m sure he doesn’t even know. Mors Praetor’s favors have saved us on more than one occasion. Call me if you can get to Giovanni.”

    “Understood.” I hung up. I was only a little worried as I pulled open the glass door of the Night Life building. It looked no different than any other mall I’d ever been in. Similar to the AU building with it’s straight up to the top empty space. A patch of wide sunlight streamed to the ground and several people stood in the middle basking in it’s warmth. I didn’t get it but as I walked past I felt nothing from the person. No leaking of thoughts. Wasn’t Venatori, had to be vampire.

    “First time in the sun?” I asked as I hurried past the next one.

    The man laughed but didn’t move. It was funny but not worth moving if any human had heard me. Maybe here reality was lost. Maybe here vampires really did exist.

    I didn’t exactly know where the prince of darkness slept at night. I vaguely remembered Nox saying it was up high, counter intuitive to what you’d think for a vampire that couldn’t bear the sunlight, but then there was that one down here. Another vague memory of the glass being different. Fuck! I should pay better attention to the things Nox’s says, they aren’t all completely useless.

    I took the elevator up. The top few floors were locked down tight, so I would ride until I could make it to the right floor. Fuck! Maybe I should just call. At the first stop no one got on, there were people standing there but no one moved. I held the door but they all waved me on. It happened again at the next stop. It was troubling. There was no chatter around me as I rose another level and the door dinged open. I started for the door, and found the way barred by a tall blond with piercing green eyes and a fucking smirk I wanted to wipe off his face. “Alex, right?”

    “Who’s asking?”

    He stepped into the elevator with me punched a code into the elevator console. “My name is Ryan Elliot.”

    “I know the name.”

    “Now you know the pretty face,” he said. I couldn’t help but like him.

    “So where are you taking me?” I asked.

    “You came to see what was it you said, ‘the prince of darkness’.”

    “Do all of you fucking talk?” I asked.

    “Sheridan called Allison to make sure we didn’t kill you on sight.”

    “You’d really kill me?”

    Ryan shook his head. “Well no, but if you’d tried to punch in a code on the panel we’d have flooded the elevator with knock out gas.”

    “And then you would have killed me.” We rode the rest of the way up until the 51st floor. Almost all the way up, but not quite. Ryan opened the door and we walked into the hall. He opened the first door on the right and waved for me to step inside.

    The room was pretty much empty, it was marked off into a square in the middle. “You brought me to the dojo.”

    “Ant’s office. He’ll be here as soon as he has a bite to eat.”

    “A human?”

    “His usual breakfast, the girl he brought home last night. She isn’t compelled if that’s what you are worried about,” Ryan said.

    “I hope he fucked her before he feed on her.”

    Ryan laughed. “That’s usually his MO. Not that I pay attention to that.”

    The door opened and tall dark and handsome walked through it. “You could have called Alex, you didn’t have to wake me up.”

  • Don’t Give Up

    Don’t Give Up

    I have a new favorite song:

  • Poison and More

    Poison and More

    I was sitting in Nox’s favorite booth at Bonnie’s waiting on one of his best friends who had hacked his own friend for me. Made me wonder what kind of friend does that. Though I had paid a pretty penny for him to use his friend. So I guess he was better friend than it seemed.

    Bonnie came over with a smile. “I haven’t seen you for a while. You and Nox have a falling out?”

    I laughed. “We had a falling out, a falling in and then a fucking fall.”

    Bonnie sighed. “I had heard he’d gotten himself hurt. I keep telling him this cult of his is going to get him killed, but he’s a strong kid, been through hell and back, he’ll get through this.”

    “I hope so,” I said sadly.

    “Sage, darling,” Bonnie chimed as the hacker walked into the room. “No little missus?”

    “No she’s working. I sent her to go look in on Nox for me. I need to talk to Alex,” he said sitting down opposite me with a smile, but he didn’t say anything until after we had ordered our food. After Bonnie left he laughed, “Pancakes and icecream – Nox must love you for that.”

    I smiled. “His pancakes are my favorite. What couldn’t you tell me over the phone?”

    Sage slide a drive over the table. “Everything I’m about to tell you is on this, you can see for yourself. I didn’t start out looking into Nox. I swear you have to tell him I only did it because I was looking out for him. I’ve kept this from him too long, too many things, and he’ll be angry, so I need you to stand up for me. Please, Alex. Nox is ….”

    “Sage, I got it. He’s like your brother, except you liked to watch him,” I growled a little at the latter bit.

    Sage blushed. “I’m sorry.”

    “Don’t be. But know you won’t be doing that again. He’s mine. And I want you to give me every copy of everything you have. Don’t keep a single frame of it.”

    Sage nodded. And I smiled. “So we are square. I get it – really but he’s mine.”

    “Okay, but you aren’t going to like what I tell you,” Sage said.

    “Did you do any of it?”

    “No.”

    I laughed. “Then nothing to be mad at you for.”

    Sage took a deep breath. “Nox has a lot of redacted files and the farther I dug the more troubling things became. But all that aside, the Venatori are trying to …” Sage cut himself short when Bonnie brought over our drinks. The tall blue eyed boy gave her a wide smile that reminded me of Nox and waited until she put things down. “Thank you, Bonnie.”

    He waited until she was gone before he continued. “They are trying to kill Nox.” Sage did whatever Sage did in his head and he was accessing his phone’s memory.

    He shoved it over to me and showed me a very marked up report. Most of it was marked out in black ink, so it was a public file with redacted information. But one word stared out at me ‘nepenthe’. I pointed to the word on the document and asked, “Do you know what this is?” Sage shook his head. “It’s the only drug that gets a Venatori high – it’s lethal to humans.”

    Sage nodded. “Anything in the dosage and timing they are giving Nox could kill him. We have to get him out of there.”

    I couldn’t have agreed more. “We can’t do this alone.”

    “Who the fuck is going to help us against the Venatori?”

    I laughed. “I have a few thoughts on that. Do you have full access to Nox’s phone?”

    Sage nodded, “Yeah, what are you looking for?”

    “Send all his contacts to my phone. I have a stop to make, I’ll call you with where to meet?”

    Sage laughed, “Food, then help Nox. He’ll hurt you if you die from starvation.”

    “I should do this first,” I said sliding out of my seat.

    Sage rolled his eyes. “Well since you don’t have the contacts yet, sit down and eat and when I’m satisfied we can go save your boyfriend.”

    “You are a fucking bastard you know that?” I growled but sat down. “Fine. I’ll eat.”

    Sage was smiling happily. “You know Nox is happier with you. Even when you went awol on him. He was a mess, but he was happy.”

    “So?”

    Sage laughed again and I could see why Nox liked him. “You do know Nox right? Tall brooding guy who is a complete and utter fake until you get under the mask. Nox was usually only ever truly happy when he was curled up in a puppy pile at my house. On the nights of the full moon, when those of us who didn’t turn because we were too young (or me cause I can’t) he’d come sit with us, and it was the only time I ever got to feel the touch of the pack. I grew up never being a part of what it meant to be pack, and Nox would hold me close protect me from the hands and feet around us while they piled around him. He loved it. Even showing us his nightmares were worth that feeling.”

    “So the puppy pile at his house the past few days is likely to be a thing?” I sighed. I was never going to have any alone time with him now. What the fuck was I getting into? Why did this pretty boy make me want to do it? That was what scared me most. I wanted to be here with him. Even in Vegas I knew it. I fought it. Every picture, every text he’d sent made me angry at myself.

    Sage chuckled and nodded. “If his kids and brothers are anything like him, then yes, I imagine that there will be a lot of touching.”

    Great!

  • Passing Time

    Passing Time

    We got to see Nox the next day. The little ones were with Ryan and the twins were with me. But it was only me they let in to see him. Ant had been asleep in the middle of the day. He looked horrible, his body was purple and blue and he looked tagged lying in the white bed covered in the white sheet to his waist.

    I soon found out why they let me in. Both Dorian and Kai told the doctors I was the point of contact and I had to sign off on any treatment. And there was paper work signed by Nox stating so. I was surprised by the but if news.

    A small slip of a girl sat down next to me and twirled a purple stand of hair around her finger. “Nox was a good kid even if he was a little weird. I treated him badly. Everyone did. Do you know how he got those scars on his back?”

    “Yeah the asshole he saved did it to him.” I growled.

    “Garrett?” she asked. “He says he doesn’t know. But it doesn’t matter.” She sighed. “He has a history of suicide and they want to move him to the psyche ward before he wakes up. You can’t stop us but you can put in a petition to get him out but he’s dangerous.”

    “Is that the only reason I’m here?”

    “And to see him of course.”

    “Madison.” I plucked her name from her head and her relationship with Nox too… bitch, “I’ll be taking him as soon as he wakes up no matter where he is so take him wherever you want,” I said and left my pretty boy before I literally killed the messenger.

    They moved Nox to another room, in another wing, in a much more secure facility behind an orange door even. I sat outside of it trying to sleep, and get into the dreams of my pretty boy. They wouldn’t let me inside the room. But Ant said he could get in later in the day when the shadows were deeper.

    There was motion next to me and I felt the bench shift. I didn’t open my eyes I didn’t care who was joining me. sat there trying to reach my boy.

    It was a while before they spoke. “How is he?” his father asked.

    “Broken, battered and still asleep. He looks like like he’s healing, but they don’t know why he won’t wake up and they won’t let me inside.”

    “How are you?”

    “I’m in need of a shower. I probably should eat, I’m sure there are a thousand other things I should be doing. But I can’t leave him.”

    Kai chuckled, “Well, you can either leave at my suggestion, or I can let Dorian do his magic and drag you out even if you are kicking and screaming.”

    “He wouldn’t really do it would he?”

    Kai laughed, “Yes, he would. He deals with arrogant teenagers and he will man handle you himself”

    “I think I’ll sit here a while longer,” I said.

    “I figured you’d say that,” Kai said and then there was a long pause between us which I was fine with but apparently Nox’s estranged father wasn’t. “Nox tells me he hurt you because of something that happened to me.”

    “What of it?” I didn’t turn to look at the older man. I just wanted my pretty boy to wake up.

    “Do you doubt him?”

    “Doubt he told the truth, that he really saved you?” I sighed and looked at him. “Nox is not a liar.”

    “I know. But he is. He lies everyday about what he is, what he does. But that’s also why he doesn’t lie.”

    “Look Kai, sir, I’m a fucking con man, the fact that he’s forgiven me for what I did to him I think we are on the same page. Nox and I are good – really really good – if he can wake the fuck up.”

    Kai sighed. “I’m sorry I mentioned it. But I wanted to tell you I’m grateful for the sacrifice he made for my life. I got to see my son grow into a great man, I get to see him raise even better children and to meet the one person who’s been with him his whole horrible life.”

    “Maybe I will go home, take a nap.”

    Kai nodded. “I’d love the chance to sit down and talk to you, if you’ll allow it, one day after this has all settled down.”

    I nodded. “Yeah, sure.” I just wanted to get away right now.

    I thought about going back to my place. To be alone, but then I thought about the kids. Fucking kids. Nox kept saying ours when he talked about the kids. Our kids, like we were already married. I looked down at the ring on my finger and wondered if that was all he needed, just proof that I loved him. The whole idea of a wedding wasn’t important anymore, just him being here with me. Ant was lucky he got to feel that connection, he knew Nox was alive. I didn’t want to be but I was jealous.

    I opened the door to Nox’s apartment and I wasn’t surprised to see the three little ones sitting on the laps of the other three boys watching a movie. Laker and Matt were leaning against each other holding one of the boys each, and Rider and Cass were sitting at the other end of the couch. That was my family – minus Nox.

    Cass was the first one to notice me but I was already walking away into Nox’s bedroom – our bed room according to him. It wasn’t home though. I did lay down on the bed, and Fee scattered to the window to rest in the sun there. I closed my eyes and just wanted to find Nox in my dreams.

    The bed shifted and I felt little hands on mine and she made herself at home curled up to me. “I want my Dad.”

    I pulled her close. “Me too, Cass. Me too.”

    She giggled. “I want Daddy too, but can’t you stay with us?” My eyes popped open at the realization she had just called me her dad. How the fuck did we get to this. She pressed her body against me. “Hunter says Daddy will be okay.”

    There was a third shift in the bed and I glanced at the disturbance to find Hunter climbing up and I held out an arm and he came to the other side, Drake followed him and he curled up next to Cass. Rider was in the doorway. “I was going to tell them to leave you alone, but seems you got it under control.”

    He opened his mouth and then hesitated and I knew what he wanted. “The three of you can join us, it’s what you’d do with Nox isn’t it?”

    Laker spoke from behind his brother. “We’ve all been sleeping in his bed, your bed at night.”

    “Come on. I don’t bite.”

    That was all the invitation they needed, the three teenage boys climbed up on to the other side of Drake – Rider, Laker then Matt. That made me worry, that they were so young.

    “What do you two know about wolf packs?” I asked the twins.

    Rider shrugged, “Not much.”

    It’s what I figured. “I think there are a lot of conversations we need to have but I want to sleep, try to reach Nox.”

    For the next three days I went to sit outside Nox’s door. But every night I came home to the family Nox had built for us. I hadn’t really thought about sleeping arrangements each night, but they always ended up in bed with me. And every night I felt him calling me but there was this fog I had to climb through. But he called me like he used to.

    Every evening before I came home, I met with Ant for dinner and we talked. He avoided the AU building but said that he was trying to find a way inside. The rooms were warded from shadowwalking, which was the only reason Nox was still in the stupid building.

    Three fucking days of misery. But everyone was helping out. Dorothy Vega stopped by the apartment with lunch for the kids. Rider and Laker had breakfast. Matt was there in the afternoons to help, and I brought dinner home, we at as a family, I didn’t eat much, but mostly because I’d eaten with Ant before making it home to them.

    I tried to find Nox every night but I couldn’t get through the fog. I even called Kish, but that didn’t help anything either, only worried her, she and Kay were working to take off time to come help even though I told them not to come. Nox needed to get better.

    My phone ringing surprised me as I sat outside the orange door. From a number that I didn’t recognize. I answered it cautiously. “Hello?”

    “Alex, are you with Nox?”

    “Wicked? You never call me.”

    The Wicked Truth laughed on the other side of the line. “Well I’m not exactly calling as The Wicked Truth. It’s just Sage right now, you know that connection you had me make to get Venatori information from? About Nox I assume.”

    “Yeah, what of it?”

    “I know you gave it to your boss, but I kept the back door myself and I’ve been digging around. I have a lot of information and I really need to talk to you about it. Not over the phone, can you meet me?”

    “Of course. Now? We can meet at Bonnie’s. I probably should eat.”

    “Yeah, sounds good Alex. See you in a few.”

  • Oh Hell No

    Oh Hell No

    The next few are between The Dream and What Happened.

    Oh Hell No (Alex)

    Everything happened so quickly once we got to the Garrett’s apartment. Nox was nervous, and defiant and the supplicant and it was all so very fast and I swore I saw the fucking thing form before it flew at me. Nox was struggling but I felt the bastard trying to manipulate him, It’s all in your head. I told Nox. But, I didn’t have time to worry about anything other than getting away from the fucking fireball. But we were close range and when it smashed into my chest and threw me against the wall I screamed. I felt the heat, it licked my skin like a lover and I screamed again and tried to put the fire out.

    I didn’t know what was going on, I wasn’t burning. I wasn’t hurt. What the fuck? But I was burning clearly. Nox’s mind was fragmenting. I’m fine. I told him again I couldn’t breathe right, it hurt to inhale.

    “You are not fine,” Nox shouted I could see myself through his eyes. He was panicking but that bastard was getting away. And the prince of darkness lay limp against the wall dead it looked.

    I am. I promise. I got this. It just looks bad. I don’t know what the fuck it is but go.

    He looked at me still struggling. With a deep breath he said, “Fuck! I’ll be back. Ant should wake up soon.” And then was gone.

    I didn’t really have this. I didn’t know what the fuck to do, nothing you learned from your childhood fire classes worked. Stop, Drop, Roll. Yeah I did that.

    I don’t know how long I tried not to panic. Panic made it hard to breathe. And I needed to breathe. The fire wasn’t hurting me. Anthony Giovanni stood over me and the fire vanished, he was crooking his head to the side like he was fixing a broken neck or simply cracking.

    “Ouch,” he said. “Where’s Nox?” He didn’t look frantic. “You okay?”

    “He went this way.” I ran after my pretty boy with the fucking vampire prince following me.

    I pushed open the door to the roof and Ant took jumped three steps back when the sunlight streamed into the door. “I’m no good out there.” But it was too late as I watched Nox dive over the fucking edge of the building.

    “Nox,” I shouted but it didn’t matter he was over the edge. I race to the edge to see the aftermath. “Fuck! Fuck!” I kept muttering as I watched my pretty boy nose dive into the man and slow the fuck down. He flipped the asshole over so his back was to the ground instead of the bastard who had hurt him. Fucking idiot. But it took longer to hit the ground than I thought it would, I couldn’t watch. I stepped away and walked to the door where a smoking vampire stood.

    He stepped back once I had the door and he said something but I didn’t hear him. I was lost in my head. Once we were at the next landing the vampire grabbed my shoulder and shouted, “He’s not dead.” And he stepped into the shadows and we were in the shadows looking at the mass of people who had gathered.

    The crowd parted just as I hurled my guts out in the alley. And Nox travelled like this. No fucking way, I thought to myself. Ant put his hand on my shoulder, “I’ll tell you how to make it better but go check on him. He’s not dead. I’d know it if he were. Please hurry he needs a life line Alex.”

    That was all I needed to push past the crowd and roll the asshole off the top of Nox. Everyone was looking at me like I was crazy but the fucking Venatori was groaning as he lay on his back. Nox was left in the ground. It felt like mud but it hadn’t rained in weeks. I put my hand on his throat and there was still a pulse. “You better not die on me now you bastard. You fucking fucking idiot.”

    I was pushed out of the way as the paramedics from inside the building pushed into the crowd. They hurriedly took him into the building and I followed afterwards but they wouldn’t let me inside the building. “Fuck you!” I shouted after them. Ant stood in the shadows and I could have sword I saw blood sliding from his eye before he wiped it away.

    “Can you get us inside?” I asked the vampire.

    “Yeah. Trust me Alex. Close your eyes, and fucking trust me.”

    “I don’t know if I can do that.”

    “I liked to see Nox weak. It made me feel good to see him hurling after a shadow walk. You have to trust me Alex.”

    I growled, “I fucking trust you.”

    And we stepped into the shadows and we were in Nox’s old bedroom. It was still the same just not furnished. No one had moved in yet.

    Ant lead the way and we hurried to what he said was the Infirmary.

    We didn’t get past the Infirmary front entrance. We’d been trying for hours. I couldn’t reach Nox by dream and and powers were useless in this building except in a few places and none of them worked to get us inside. No one was letting us in; that was until Dorian Vega strolled through in a hurry. “Alex!” He looked at the vampire standing with me, “Anthony.”

    “It’s Ant.” He frowned. “How is he?”

    “Alive. Barely.” Dorian nodded quickly. “My mother is at the apartment to sit with the kids. Matt and the twins are in the waiting room. Let me take you to them. It’s as far as I can get you.” Dorian didn’t even look at the receptionist who was glaring at us. “I will see that you two have eternal passes into the building, never really thought it would be needed. But there we have it.”

    Ant asked, “Why didn’t you think we’d need it?”

    Dorian frowned, “Mostly because if he ever did anything like this again, he’d be dead. His luck has to run out sometime.”

    “I don’t think it’s luck. Just like I don’t think it’s luck Alex had that book.”

    “What book?” Dorian and I both said at the same time.

    Ant patted the backpack. “This one.”

    Dorian raised an eyebrow and Ant added, “I’ll let the wonder boy tell you about it when he’s better.”

    “What about me?” I asked.

    “We’ll chat. But I think you need to hold on to this.” He handed me the bag. “Your boyfriend will kill me if you die on my watch.”

    “I’ll kill you if he dies on your watch,” I threatened.

    “You can try,” Ant said. “I might beat you to it.”

    “You’d kill yourself?”

    Ant shook his head as we were ushered into a room where Matt, Rider and Laker sat. The twins were up and wrapping their arms around me like I was their brother. They weren’t crying but it was sombre. He sat down and I followed suit, the boys sat back down.

    Ant spoke in my head, If he dies, I might die with him. It’s always a fear with these bonds – we know nothing of it.

    Why would anyone do that? I asked

    It’s more about the power, and trust, and really believing in that bond. Ryan and Mia truly are dedicated to my mother. They both live because of her, and they’d die if she ever died and they lived. It made sense for them. And my dad, well he loves her and she loves him. Even though they don’t exactly agree on things. Mother is hard to love. I trust Nox with my life, he knew what he was doing jumping off that building. He knew he might die, but he knew he had to save him, even if he was the bastard who tormented him. That’s just Nox. You can’t get mad at him. He can’t change who he is anymore than you can.

    I sighed. I know.

  • The Black Blur

    The Black Blur

    Between Inducing Nightmares and What Happened?

    Leaving Nox was probably the hardest thing I had to do. His confession was rattling my head, all I wanted to was to protect him. And whatever the fuck this thing was had to go. He took it all with ease, like it was no big deal. It bothered the fuck out of me.

    The walk to the main house was longer than I remembered. Kish was sitting in her rocker outside. “Hey Little Z.”

    “I can’t believe Karma told Nox I used to sleep all the time. I hate that nick name, but I think he likes it.”

    “So tell him you don’t like it.”

    “I need a cup of coffee.”

    Kish followed me inside. “Did he go for it?” she asked.

    “He’s being all brave. One more nightmare, for a life of freedom.” I laughed nervously. Nox had added more than that to his words but I didn’t need to tell that to Kish.

    “And that’s the problem is in’t?” she observed.

    “He told me, in order to get the dream to come faster he has to think of me. That thinking of me hurt him.” I stomped the coffee into the filter and started brewing a new pot. “He’s fucking letting his demon’s attack him, because I asked him to on the barest thinnest of hopes I can see this thing and kill it. On. Hope,” I growled. “He’s putting all his hope on me.”

    Kish put her arm protectively around my shoulders as I waited for coffee. “Oh Z you know that it comes every night regardless right? He believes in you, he’s an optimist, how ever did you end up with a Venatori boy? Of all the men in this world, your soul mate had to be him.”

    She was right, but he was who he had always been. I shouldn’t have been so naive, he was always so obvious about it, but I couldn’t see it, blinded by the completeness of everything. And now he was putting his faith in me. Even after I ran away, even after I told him I was spying on him, paid to do so by someone. And he never asked their name. He fucking never asked anything. Nothing.

    I was making myself angry. But I wasn’t angry with the pretty boy trying to sleep in my childhood bed. I was angry with myself. “Fuck Kish, if I told you he drove me crazy in the worst and best ways would you be angry with me?”

    “No, I could never be mad with you Alex. And I can tell you love him. And he loves you.” I have Kish a quick hug, poured a cup of coffee and moved to get back to my pretty boy. As crazy as he made me, I didn’t want to leave him long.

    “I need to get back to him.” Kish nodded.

    I walked back a little faster than I had left. I felt guilty enough staying too long. The air was getting colder. The sun had set and the mountain air was always colder than the cities below. I wanted to go inside but I didn’t want to wake him. I was a fucking mess. I pushed the door open.

    And there it was sitting on his chest. A thing of black. I dropped my coffee mug and it shattered on the floor. It startled me, my reaction wasn’t expected. It turned and hissed at me with glowing red eyes. “Mine!” it growled. Its back feet were dug into his chest. There was nothing but trial and error so I did the one thing the book said to do. I grabbed the blue tube of salt and I poured a pile in my hand and threw it at the thing.

    It screeched as the salt landed on it. At least that worked. There was an iron pick used to stock the fire and I had it in hand. Iron and salt it said. I should have consulted with Nox about this, see what he thought about the plan. He trusted me. I had to do this right.

    I threw another handful of salt at it and it lunged for me as I poked it with a stick. I wondered if fire might help. But it didn’t matter, it squealed and dodge my attack. I wished I was better at this.

    The door to the room burst open and Kish and Kay were standing in the door way. They were chanting something. I didn’t wait to figure it out. This hadn’t been part of my plan, but it was working. I wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. I threw another handful of salt and stabbed into the ink black flesh and it howled. Blood flowed from underneath Nox and he cried out in pain, sitting up, the bedding was bloody. Nox was covered in blood I wasn’t sure if it was his or the things.

    The thing was howling in pain but it turned to on the skewer and pushed its body closer to me howling. It slashed at me with three inch claws. It caught my hand and I jerked away in pain. I didn’t remember making a sound, but I must have for Nox’s eyes to snap to me as I tumbled backwards the black thing launching itself at me. All four feet with three inch claws were pointed at me and I tried to scrabble backwards away from it as it flew at me like the black blur that whisked Nox away every night as a boy.

    There was fire, and screaming and I don’t know if it was me or the thing about to land on top of me.

    It floated and burned but never landed. And then I saw – really saw. Kish and Kay had fallen silent. Nox was kneeling on the edge of the bed his hand was out stretched and he was calm. Ever so calm. And there between us was the black thing, the blur. It screamed. It burned. The room smelled like burning hair and sulphur and all the worse things in the world all put together. It floated in nothing and it collapsed in on itself, still burning, screaming until there was a small pop and the thing fell silent.

    And then Nox collapsed and fell off the edge of the bed and crumpled on the floor.

  • Nightmares

    Nightmares

    Between Dream Recreation and Not So Morning Bliss

    Seeing Nox again had me all over the map – figuratively and literally. What was I doing? I kept asking myself. I knew I’d seen him at the bar, but ignored it. I ignored the fact that Nox was in Vegas, I heard him the moment he stepped off the plane. Benji had been acting all sorts of weird. I was still dazed. But even after all this time seeing Nox, my pretty boy chased me across the country. And not because he had wanted to yell at me like everyone kept saying, he just wanted closure to know it was over. But neither of us wanted that. So I laid in bed with Nox draped over me like a hot blanket. He was asleep, I felt that tingle that meant he was calling me. I could slip into the dream. Could be with him, but I was having a hard time breathing. I felt off my game, yet Nox knew me even when he didn’t.

    How had I been so wrong all this time?

    I couldn’t lay there anymore, even with Nox curled around me so soft and tenderly. He hadn’t even gotten dressed after cleaning up. Which was unusual to say the least. He was acting more and more unlike himself and he was hiding from me. Well not hiding, I wasn’t seeing all the thoughts in his head – that was my own fault. I was out of his head. It was me who was off their game, not him. He was just Nox. Always the same guy. He was happier when I wasn’t in his head. His smile was infectious. His demeanor always bright. But I knew the moment I went into his head I’d see the tumbling, the rambling, the pain of his existence. He hid it so well. Why did he hide it from me?

    There was a small voice in my head as I slipped out from underneath the man who kept telling me he loved him in off the wall ways. Never quite saying those three little words but saying them none the less. The voice told me because you’d pity him if you saw the truth. And it was right. I didn’t know how he survived day in and day out. Some days he was drowning inside. The moment I was no longer touching Nox, the familiar tingle vanished and I no longer had to fight the urge not to go to my pretty boy in the dream.

    I pulled on a pair of jeans and stepped outside into the cool darkness of the night. I left the door open a crack so I didn’t need my key to get back in. Serenity was parked in front of the room in all her sleek gorgeousness. “Why aren’t guys like you baby,” I said out loud to my favorite possession. Well … I looked at the ring on my finger and smiled. Maybe not anymore. It was a simple gift but it had more meaning than anything else. I took it off and slipped it on my left hand. I knew when it fit my right, that it was made for my left. He’d known somehow. All his talk of patterns and whatevers he just knew.

    I heard the sheets rustle behind me and I saw Nox flinch. Fuck! I pushed open the door and stopped the moment the lamp light hit his body. I had expected to see his naked body curled around the pillow, instead a black mound of something sat on his chest and Nox whimpered in his sleep. What the hell?

    I took a step forward and the floor boards creaked and it’s fiery red eyes turned to look at me like an owl on a tree limb, a full fucking 180. It hissed at me then looked back at Nox and then back to me. It dug a claw into his chest with one of its back feet and Nox spasmed but no blood flowed from what looked like a painful wound. It hissed at me again, “Mine!”

    There was nothing between me and it but when I grabbed it to fling it from Nox’s body it was gone, a puff of black smoke left in its wake. Gone like it never existed. Nox lay in bed peacefully curled around my pillow like nothing happened. I shook him gently and he looked at me through sleep crusted eyes, “Hmmm?”

    I shook my head, “Nothing. Go back to bed.”

    What the fuck was that?

  • Demon Free

    Demon Free

    We stayed until the demon was nothing but ash that blew away on the wind scattered to the far reaches of my mind. Phobetor was dead, I wondered if that meant anything for me.

    Alex took my hand and we stepped out of the dream together. I gasped from the puppy pile and everyone yelped as I sat up. I hugged them all. But it was the blue eyed man lying next to me staring up at the hugging that I couldn’t look away from. I leaned down and peppered Alex’s face with kisses, whispering, “Thank you, I love you.” Over and over again until Alex leaned up and caught my lips with his own.

    Hunter wrapped his arms around my back and hugged me tight. Matt pressed his hand to my back, and the twins followed as they left. Cass pressed her face to the same spot and Rider carted her off. Laker and Matt tried to pry Hunter from me but he cried and clutched tired. Alex shooed them away. “He’s fine, leave him alone.” And when they left the two vampires who were silently standing in the room followed them out shutting the door behind them.

    I pried my son off of me and pulled him between me and Alex. I expected a smart comment but Alex pressed a kiss to his head. He’s just a little you. I can’t say no to him either.

    I pressed a kiss to Alex’s lips and hummed softly. This is going to straighten out our kink.

    Alex laughed. A sound I loved to hear. I added out loud, “But we’ll figure it all out.”

    Alex laid back and put his hands behind his head and I curled up next to him and Hunter curled up between us. “Are you sure this is okay?”

    Alex grabbed my chin and nodded, “Yes. You always said you like to wait. He was having a rough time while you were gone.” He kissed me hard and fast, “And now that you are demon free, we have our dreams. I can feel you baby. As soon as he died, you were in my head, pulling at me like a…” Alex trailed off with a soft laugh. “Kids present.”

    I bit my bottom lip and Alex groaned, “Let’s take a nap pretty boy. Hunter is already on his way there.”

  • Fighting Phobetor

    Fighting Phobetor

    It was dark. And the pain grew with each lash. I could feel my body trying to heal as fast as it could, blood dripping down my body before the next one hit, and then the next.

    The nightmare kept going well past its usual ending. On and on, living in this nightmare. I tried to move, but was frozen, not by my own doing, but by the will of the thing hurting me. It gave no pretenses as to what it wanted from me – pain and fear and undying torment.

    The thing cackled in the darkness, there was no eerie red glow from the eyes just the darkness and the pain.

    But it was just a nightmare. Something tickled at the edge of my senses, something I knew, or should know. But it kept slipping through my fingers as I bit back the pain from the next slash of elements against my back.

    Somewhere in the distance there was a soft breeze, it blew against my hot flushed skin with a whisper, I’m coming.

    Who was coming? The world was nothing but darkness and there was nothing I could do. The gentle breeze whispered again, a different voice this time. Daddy, come back.

    That voice struck a chord in my heart so strong that I jerked against the invisible bonds, and found that there were none. I stumbled back and fell to the ground. But in the darkness I couldn’t see anything, it was black and even the ground beneath me felt like nothing, like I was floating in an abyss with nothing around me – falling.

    Then the wind from below and above, the falling caught me off guard and I screamed. The echo of it bouncing through the air. All thought left as I screamed. I knew this feeling. If only I could control the fall.

    In the panic of the moment I felt arms wrap around me, warmth and comfort and home. The soft scent of citrus and safety smothered me and I gasped for air. I knew that smell. I’m here pretty boy.

    The name echoed in my head and I knew I should know. I knew the voice. I felt a push and then a pop and then a rush of air Come back to me. To us.

    Us. Family. Alex!

    Dream. This was a dream. I reached for my power but it slipped through my fingers like water. It was there but not there. I started to panic.

    It’s okay pretty boy. There was a soft breeze against my cheek and a flutter of wings that followed. It was a dream. I wasn’t falling.

    And as if by magic I was on ground. The dirt between my fingers was a welcome sensation. There had been no landing it just was. Vague memories floated around. I didn’t need my powers, I could bend my dream to my will.

    The world grew light, it was warm and sunny yet the sky was covered in stars. I felt the pull of Alex and I stood up to walk towards him, but as I turned I saw a man – who wasn’t really a man. He couldn’t be. His eyes were red like the demons, his skin as black as ash but he was wearing a purple pimp suit decked out with leopard print fur to accent. Gold chains hung from his neck with demonic symbols decorating each one. “Who are you?” I shouted, but it came out like a mere whisper.

    He laughed. “It doesn’t matter. But you are mine, this feeble control is nothing.” The same tentacles formed behind him and I wasn’t impressed. I’d seen them before. He lashed out at me and one caught around my arm leaving a red mark dripping with blood. The pain was real, I felt it through my whole body. But seeing a man – a man I didn’t know, a monster, a thing I had to protect my family from I could withstand anything. I was Venatori. I was…

    “Nox fucking Sétanta.” Alex’s voice chimed in loudly behind me as he grabbed my hand and entwined his fingers in mine. I looked at him with a big smile. “Sorry I took so long.”

    I couldn’t believe he was here. Wherever here was.

    “That was stupid of you, Eidolon.” I was confused, who was he talking to I looked around. There was no one but me and Alex. “You think I don’t know you, you wander the darkness, sow your chaos in the dreams. He is mine!”

    Alex laughed. “Actually, he’s mine.” He held up the ring on his finger and snickered, “Didn’t think I’d be using your gift to ward away … ”

    “Demons,” I supplied. “He’s a demon.” I sighed. “A nightmare demon, I’d have to pull books to get his name.”

    He growled at me, “Phobetor. My name is Phobetor. You insolent little bug. Who do you…”

    Alex interrupted, “We’re going to go now.”

    Phobetor didn’t like that, his hiss of displeasure sent shivers down my spine and Alex took a step back when the power grew around him. He meant to encompass in air or something but I grinned at him as a shower of flowers fell from the pattern he had tried to create. I laughed. “See, this is my dream, and thanks to my blue eyed boy here, I learned a long time ago, if it’s my dream I can control every aspect of it.”

    The demon in front of me was naked except for a pair of purple and gold boxers, and we were surrounded by a frozen waste land and it was cold – bitterly so. The demon raged and he enveloped himself in flames and he revealed his true self. He towered above us in in grotesque form – bird, beast and snake as if he couldn’t make up his mind what he wanted to be. His mouth roared at us sending spittle and foul breath.

    I squeezed Alex’s hand, I wasn’t sure if it was for my own comfort or to reassure him, but it made me feel the connection to him even more. I waved my hand in front of me and a fireball formed and I smiled. My power was my own. Phobetor glared at me. “That is mine. You are mine!” he yelled and then each step he took towards us he would repeat it.

    “Whatever you are going to do pretty boy you better do it. I don’t want to be eaten by this thing,” Alex prompted.

    The fireball flew towards the demon and he thought to block it but I softened the ground and he sank throwing off its balance and the fireball stuck true and he screamed. The fire stuck to the demon like dragon’s fire. I added fuel to the fire, more air to power the inferno and even though the stench of burning demon would remain with me until the end of time I stayed.

    Alex grinned. “How do you know that’s what burning demon smells like?”

    I looked at the man standing next to me. “I’ve exorcised a demon or two,” I said as I leaned over and kissed my fiance. He might not want a wedding, but I would give him whatever he wanted for the rest of our lives.

  • Unexpected Guests

    Unexpected Guests

    Alex sat at the bar while I started breakfast and Vin stood by the door. “Is this your normal wake up time?”

    I shrugged. “I have no idea what time it is. I’m starving so it doesn’t really matter.”

    Alex held a finger up and pulled out my watch. “Before they moved you I grabbed the watch, I didn’t want it to go into a pile of things and get lost.”

    I held out my wrist and Alex carefully placed his watch back on my wrist where it belonged. “Much better.” He held up the leather bracelet as well. “This one too.”

    I grinned at him and held out the other wrist for him to tie it back in place.

    “You two are sickeningly sweet.” Vin rolled his eyes.

    Ant was there like he’d come from no where, but there were no shadows shining, he had to come through the door. “Aren’t they? You have guests.”

    “I thought you said Vin couldn’t walk in the sun?” I asked. And then I had the oh yeah, special glass.

    He smiled at me. “It’s weird feeling the suns rays on my skin without burning. It took a while before I could actually stand it.”

    Behind Ant was Sage and Dee – and chocolate cake. Dee put the cake on the counter, but Sage was already around the counter and wrapping his arms around me tightly. “I was so worried.” He looked at Alex and then immediately dropped his arms and took a step back. “I’m so….”

    Alex laughed. “It’s alright. I get it. And I can hear your thoughts are pure.” He tapped his head. “But if they aren’t…” Alex threatened a little.

    Sage blushed. “I know how he feels I won’t push. I promise and I won’t pry,” he added as a second thought “We are just in time for breakfast.” Sage sat down next to Alex with a smile “You are going to be so well fed I’m jealous.”

    “I’m going to get fat,” Alex joked.

    “I won’t let you babe,” I said as I uncovered the cake and started cutting it.

    “What are you doing?” Alex asked.

    “It’s my favorite cake,” I said as I plated a small slice. Sage and Dee were laughing.

    Dee put her hands on Alex’s shoulders. “Oh, you’ll soon learn.”

    “Learn what?”

    “Nox does things backwards,” Dee said as she rounded the counter and took a fork from the plate and cut off a piece of my cake. I was about to say something when she offered it to me and I greedily took the fork. “Why have desert last? is his philosophy. If it’s that good why wait?”

    Alex scoffed, “For two reasons; one you haven’t even had breakfast yet, and second it’ll ruin your appetite.”

    I shook my head. “Not if you don’t over indulge.” I did my best Homer impression as I tasted the decadent chocolate cake with the perfect amount of icing and cake crumb. I leaned in to kiss Dee and saw darkness. I took a step back and stumbled. I fell backwards failing my arms trying to catch myself, but Dee caught me by the t-shirt and pulled me close with super human strength she did not posses and kissed me.

    It sounded like a train rushed through us and then there was nothing but darkness.

    It was still dark when I heard the laughter in the darkness. It was distant at first and grew louder. The voice was gravely like a madman’s. A red glow shown in the darkness and I lost all feeling in my body. My heart raced and I couldn’t breath. The voice reminded of my nightmare. There were no eyes just a red glow.

    And then I saw the colors bloom in long tentacles made of light only I could see. I froze in place and it laughed. “So, so easy.” A wall of air slammed into me and I was spread prone and couldn’t breathe from the impact. The words echoed Alex, but it wasn’t him, he wasn’t an asshole. And this was hardly sex.

    “You’re mind always goes to your dream walker, but he can’t get here,” the voice said, “You are mine now. This body is mine, you are mine.” And he laughed that cheezy maniacal laughter laugh that every evil villain on TV did. And then the pain started, each blow ripping skin from my body. “You will scream forever!”

  • Happy Reunion

    Happy Reunion

    I was hot, almost too hot, when I woke from the forced dream state. Alex had smirked at me as we kissed, but didn’t do anything else lest I moved while the doc was stabbing me. The simple thought had made my heart race until Alex kissed me again to soothe my nerves.

    I woke to a pile of kids around us. Hunter was wedged between us and Cass was nestled under Alex’s other arm. Drake was laying on top of me, Rider was curled up behind me, and Laker and Matt on the other side. I had a feeling this was the normal situation.

    Alex spoke in my head, Usually Rider’s over here with Cass. But he wanted to be near you.

    You were only half with me?

    Alex smiled. Tried to make sure you held still.

    “How long?”

    From the shadows of the room Ant spoke softly. “After Alex knocked you out and Doc was done we figured letting you wake naturally was best, so three hours? Maybe a little more.”

    Rider groaned and shushed us. We were being too loud. Ant laughed. “What do you know of what has happened?”

    “Not much. Alex let me in on some.”

    “You up for the whole story?”

    I shook my head. “Can I sleep a few more hours with my family, maybe get some breakfast with them?”

    Ant nodded. “I’ll leave Vincent at your door. I trust him.”

    “To do what?” I asked.

    “To keep you all safe.”

    “What training has he had?” I asked curiously.

    “Not enough for you, but we’ll remedy that. I don’t have the resources my mother does. Vin is good.” He pushed open the door and a tall vampire walked in, his long hair was pulled back into a pony tail and the rest was shaved on the sides.

    “So I’m getting bodyguards now?”

    “You all will have some until we get things situated. Especially right now while you are still healing.”

    I lit the room up in a chaotic symphony of lights and the elements with a smile. “I’m good.”

    “Still. I’d rather you not have to kill anyone. Vin can do that for you. We’ll talk after breakfast.”

    Alex laughed. “He’s even stiffer than usual.”

    I snuggled up against Alex and pulled the little one up higher so he nestled between us better. “I get the impression it’s a lot more dangerous than you told me.”

    Sleep came for real. And I dreamt of Alex. We explored my dreamscape together and now that I wasn’t missing things this was true. It’s just like the picture. Alex had commented as we walked.

    I didn’t want to wake up but the urge to go to the bathroom was too much. Which was probably a good sign things were on the mend. I had no idea where it was so I stayed sleeping a little longer I really need to go. I thought and Alex frowned.

    If I don’t I’ll burst. I said and Alex laughed and he winked out of the dream and I tried to follow, it wasn’t as easy for me as it was for him. But I woke up to the smell of my family resting with me and my body pressed against my son which was probably not a good place for him to be.

    I shifted away from Rider and Hunter and Alex followed me down the foot of the bed where he pulled me close and kissed me. “You do realize this really limits sex for us right?”

    I smirked. “We’ll find the time I promise.” I pressed a kiss to his lips “Where is the bathroom?”

    Alex laughed and he opened the door and revealed my own personal space, well ours. I hoped he was staying with me.

    “I’m staying. But I’m not selling my apartment.”

    “I wouldn’t want you to,” I said as I closed the door behind me. Alex’s admission lightened my heart and brightened my soul.

    I glanced at my features in the mirror when I was cleaning up. I still looked pale and hollow like I’d been asleep for a while with no real food in my system. But I walked out of the bathroom to find Vin standing inside waiting for me. Alex was no where to be seen.

    “He went to the kitchen. I’ll take you there.”

    I sighed. “Thanks. Why am I in the Night Life building?”

    “Because my master thinks its safer for you and the doc was here.”

    “Why are you watching me?”

    “Ant says that until you make a decision where you will be living you are his charge. The Venatori might come, they might not. But Ant’s kiss is far smaller than most because he doesn’t make new vampires.”

    “I know that, but why you?”

    Vin shrugged. “He trusts me. And my former master trusted me with her life so I can be trusted to keep you safe.

    “Who was your former master?” I asked curiously.

    “Aurora DeJesus. You know her?”

    I smiled. “I know of her. Ant speaks highly of her, almost like a mother to me. You kept him safe when he was a boy?”

    Vin nodded. “I was his nurse maid more often than I liked.”

    I grinned at the very old vampire. “So you are used to babysitting us babies.” I walked into the kitchen with Vin behind me Alex was in the kitchen. “You cooking?”

    Alex looked up. “I’m making coffee. And laying out stuff for you to make. I’m being helpful.”

    I grinned and walked to my boyfriend and pressed a kiss to his lips softly. “I’m famished.”

  • Heal Me

    Heal Me

    Alex was feeding me chips of ice. He was enjoying teasing me even as Doc was trying to talk to us about the results.

    “These levels aren’t going down. Is this a natural reaction to the drug?”

    I shrugged. Alex answered sorta reading my mind but putting it into his own words “Nox says that he feels empty. No pain, no emotions, his mouth is dry, his voice feels broken. His body hurts but he can’t feel it?”

    “Since you are in his head, what do you feel?”

    “I’m not exactly an empath. But I can tell he’s on drugs. I’ve seen him before like this. It’s not euphoria though.”

    “Nepenthe doesn’t work like that. Nick was addicted to it, you’ve met him,” Doc said.

    “It’s a numbing agent for magical beings. Highly addictive and deadly to humans. Nick was lucky his dealer was a vampire. And that when the vampire got caught Cari helped, is helping Nick.”

    “So it’s a lethal shield? Why can’t you figure out how to take the addiction and lethal part out.”

    Doc laughed. “We’ve tried. Nepenthe is ages old. Like Dark Ages old. Distilled from the blood of dragons, and the venom of vampire and werewolf. Not only is the drug lethal to its users but also to its donors. It his highly illegal to use and distribute the drug and has been for centuries. The fact that the Venatori are experimenting with it is highly concerning.”

    Alex quieted down and listened to my thoughts. It’s how they make tacet! It was an epiphany. How else do you take someone’s power away?

    “Fuck!” Alex said rather loudly. “Nox thinks that’s how they make tacet. How else do you take someone else’s power away.”

    Doc hummed his thoughtfulness.

    “So not trying to kill him?” Alex asked

    “In these doses it should have killed him,” Doc said. “And his power is clearly not gone even if he can’t touch it.”

    “But it’s blocking him.”

    I smiled and Alex looked at me strangely, I need Matt and Ant. But Alex relayed the message.

    Doc nodded, “They’ll be here shortly. But why them? A boy?”

    I tried to talk and it came out a hushed whisper, “I need to heal.”

    “Yeah you do.” Doc said. “But how do they help you.”

    Alex chuckled as he read the thoughts, “He has a plan.”

    So we waited for a few more moments before Matt came in his eyes wide with relief and a bright smile. “Oh my god. Thank the heavens you are okay. I was afraid I did this for nothing.”

    I smiled at him. “I’ll be better soon, with your help.”

    “What can I do? Anything?”

    He was eager and excited and Alex was being possessive as he pulled my hand into his lap. Crushes… the bane of Alex’s existence.

    Ant followed quickly behind him. “What dangerous thing are you thinking about doing this time?”

    I sipped at the cup of ice, my arm hurt lifting it but no one moved to make me sit still.

    My voice was ragged with first time use, like I’d been eating gravel or something. “I need to heal, but I can’t touch the elements. The massive does of nepenthe are blocking them, I can see them just can’t touch them.” I looked at Matt, “Must be what you feel like.” I continued, “Ant I need you to flood the room with elements, all of them, can you do that?”

    “I can alternate, but like most of your Magnus I can’t do multiple at the same time.”

    “That’s fine, as long as the room has a mass concentration of them at the same time.”

    Ant looked at me confused. “So you don’t want anything other than to drown you in fire, earth, air and water at it’s base?”

    I nodded. “Yes.” I sipped at the water my throat was getting worse and so was my voice, but I wasn’t done yet.

    “Matt, I need you to make a funnel and a compact area around me. You can push them away right, like you know how to do that?”

    Matt nodded slowly. “Yeah but if he’s flooding the room where’s it gonna go.”

    Alex answered first, “Into him.” I nodded.

    Doc was next to add information as he scratched his head. “So you are telling me this element forcing thing is going to heal you?”

    I shook my head. “Not directly. A magical creature with super healing abilities uses the bodies natural elements…”

    Doc continued for me as the realization hit him. “So you learned that if you flooded the wound with the elements, it could heal even faster. And your body is so used to having an all you can eat buffet, it doesn’t know what to do.”

    I nodded with a smile. “So Matt can compress Ant’s elements around me giving it no where else to go but to be used by the healing ability I already possess.”

    “Does this work with humans?” Doc asked as he started looking at papers and things.

    “Not that I’m aware of, they do not possess natural super healing or magical in nature.” Doc was tapping his head, thinking.

    Alex laughed. “He’s not thinking about us anymore. Ant do your thing? But wait, is this going to hurt?”

    I shrugged. Alex nodded. “Don’t think about kicking me out.”

    Wouldn’t dream of it lover.

    I laid down and curled up next to Alex, it might hurt, and it might hurt a lot. There was still a lot to heal. Hair line fractures, bruising, internal bleeding, not to mention removing the nepenthe from my system.

    I felt the elements flowing around me. I didn’t see them I didn’t want to give any nervous reactions to Alex, because I was afraid he’d stop if it hurt me too bad. And then everything felt claustrophobic, I couldn’t breathe, the pain was surpassing the void that was my high. I didn’t make any noise though I wanted to but no sound escaped. Alex just held me and pressed his face into the side of neck. He didn’t want to watch either.

    I could smell the sweat from the two men working hard. But their hard work paid off, what felt like hours later to all of us was mere minutes for the world, the pain eased and then as the nepenthe left the pain was a hell of a lot worse, but it eased as quickly as it came. I grasped for the elements and sighed with relief. “You can stop now I can finish.”

    Doc was at my side moments later. “Your vitals are better. I want to do x-rays and scans and I need more blood work. I need a full panel Nox. I can put you to sleep…”

    Alex shook his head and he pressed a kiss to my lips and nudged hard, Sleep

    It was instantaneous for me and I was back in the vivid dream – the tree, the stary sky with the setting sun. And sitting next me was my favorite blue eyed boy.

  • Waking Up

    Waking Up

    Sex in the dream was always interesting. First we were here, then there. Me on top, Alex quickly after. And Alex had much more fine control of things. Dream walker and all. But I didn’t care. He was mine. And I was his and here nothing kept us apart.

    But in the real world my body was healing, the nepenthe was leaving my system and I felt less and less emptiness and more pain. I had broken every bone in my body. And healing was still not complete.

    The climax came in our dream and I groaned in the emptiness of the room I was in. I felt Alex beside me. Fuck I’d left him – again. I squeezed his hand and shifted to try to kiss his head but it hurt to move and I groaned again this time in pain. I tried to say Fuck but I heard Alex chuckling next to me. “I have never been so happy to have you disappear on me.” He leaned over and pressed a kiss to my lips. “It’s okay.”

    Ant was shaking his head, “You two have fun in there?”

    “Jealous?” Alex asked.

    “Of you? No,” Ant said deadpan.

    “Of him?” Alex asked.

    “Hardly.” Ant smirked. “Of your connection a lot actually.”

    Alex frowned, “Sorry man.”

    “Nothing to worry about. Doc needs to check him out now. You think you can pry yourself away from him for a little while? I’m sure there are a bunch of people who would love to know he’s awake.”

    Alex smiled before he said, “I think you can fuck off and run your own errands.” My head snapped up to see Ant’s reactions.

    Ant laughed. “Doc still needs to check him out and he’ll need room.” Ant shook his head and left the room letting Doc in before he did.

    I was hungry. I needed energy. I needed to heal.

    Alex called after Ant. “Can you order something light from Marco’s Nox needs food. And the kids should probably wait till Doc’s done checking Nox out before they come in.” Alex looked at me. “A lot has happened. And there are a lot of people who are going to want to see you and make you make decisions.”

    Doc looked at my pupils with a bright light, checked my mouth and throat and did the ear thing. Blood pressure cuff and all that while Alex laid next to me. “He’ll need a bit more water. We need to get him up and walking. He doesn’t look like he’s atrophied much.” Doc squeezed my arm and moved down to my legs still under the blankets. He saw certain body parts and chuckled. “You’ll want to save the sex for later, after the nepenthe has left your system and you’ve had time to gain some of your strength back.”

    He pulled out a syringe and I flinched violently against Alex who caught me but only just barely before I was out of the bed, tumbling because my legs hadn’t worked well.

    Doc sighed. “Violently afraid of needles. Gotcha. I need a blood sample to see how you are faring in getting back to normal.”

    Alex had his hands around me and he shoved my head into his neck. He said, “Don’t bite me too hard.” I didn’t know what he meant by that but he nodded and Doc stabbed me and I yelped. My blood coursed through my veins like it was on fire, I felt clammy and gross and Alex held me tight against him. I hadn’t been ready for it.

    Doc stepped away from the bed and Alex’s grip on me lessened. “It’s over,” he soothed and smoothed his hand over my hair.

    “Maybe those earrings might be a bad idea too?” Alex chuckled.

    “You think?” I whispered against his neck.

    “How did you manage the first time?” Alex asked.

    The terrifying fear came after. I thought my voice still hurt to talk. I showed Alex in my head, speaking hurt too much.

    Dorian pretty much let me do anything I asked, so getting earrings when I was 10 was nothing for him. I wanted to be different, he was okay with that. It was my first experience with Ash and his way of things. He was a good man, but he was an even better woman. I was still too young to understand what that meant, but Ash helped me get what I wanted done. It hurt but it was okay. I could deal with it, there was the typical childhood fear and pain but it was quickly forgotten.

    But it wasn’t until after my first sexual experience with a man that Dorian found out about my active sex life. He’d come in while I was changing and saw that I’d been roughed up a bit. I was 14. We had the whole birds and bees talk and Dorian started me down a path of regular checkups. I was half human after all, and in my half human state I was prone to colds and other diseases like my human brethren. I was vaccinated as a child and so many other things even though I healed like Venatori I still caught the common cold.

    The first time I had blood work done in the Infirmary was by a novice nurse who thought Dorian was a quack and that I was fine. Just leave it be, didn’t believe I could get sick or whatever. So she jabbed me multiple times in her effort to draw a few vials of blood. And it wasn’t a simple jab, more like she was digging around in my veins with sand paper and I was already prone to panic attacks so when I started panicking and shuddering in fear it only made it worse.

    Dorian eventually calmed me down.

    After the first time Dorian took me to a discrete human doctor named Dr. Meredith Hanson. She was a lady who worked in the local Planned Parenthood. I knew her well by the time I was 18. And she knew me well, but she no longer worked for the organization and had moved on to her own OB practice, but she still did the work herself – for me. It pays to be cute.

    Alex chucked at my thoughts It pays to be cute huh?

    I nodded and pressed a kiss to Alex’s lips. “You are too cute,” I whispered against his lips nipping at them before Doc cleared his throat to remind us we weren’t alone.

    “Hmmmmm…..” he said after a moment.

    “That isn’t good,” Alex said.

  • What Happened

    What Happened

    It was strange being in this dream world. I wasn’t used to it. But from afar I recognized it. The tree, the sky and everything. It was in every dream with Alex. And as if the thought summoned him I saw him crest a hill and walk towards me.

    I felt foggier than before, like something else was taking hold of me. But the only thing I cared to see was the man walking towards me. I knew he wanted to rush to me, but he forced himself to walk to me. He didn’t run, that wasn’t Alex. It wasn’t a dream and as soon as he reached me I fell into him. He wrapped his arms around me and we fell to the grassy ground. I missed him.

    He pressed a kiss to my forehead and held me against him. “Jesus Nox, you need to wake up pretty boy. We need you.” After a few moments Alex added so quietly I barely heard the whisper on the wind, “I need you.”

    Alex held me close for an unfathomable amount of time – at least it felt like that to me in this place where time was strange.

    “I can’t wake up. If I move from the tree too far it starts to burn.” I looked up and pointed into the distance at the burnt edge of the world. “It hurts.”

    “You jumped off a fucking building and almost died of course it fucking hurts,” Alex chided me.

    I smirked. “He survived then?” I asked carefully not looking at Alex. I knew he’d be angry.

    “He did. What happened?” Alex asked. And I could tell that he was straining to keep his anger in check. His eyes were on fire and it made me afraid. The thunder sounded in the distance and I curled up against Alex’s chest.

    “The demon taunted me, and then I had to make a choice. Let the man who haunted my life die, or save him. There was a moment of fear in Garrett’s eyes when he realized the demon had abandoned him after he had stepped off the edge.” I sighed. “No one should die like that. I don’t care who he is, or what he did.”

    “Nox…”

    “I don’t expect you to understand Alex.”

    “Explain it to me.”

    The world shook as the thunder sounded again. I took a deep breathe and sat up and looked at Alex. “If he’s not worth a second chance, or a third or even a forth, then why should I be given one?”

    “You aren’t a monster, Nox. He tortured kids and he gets off on it.”

    “And you know this? That demon possessed him, you know without a shadow of doubt that he wasn’t coerced into hurting me? You know, Alex?”

    “He hurt you.”

    “I hurt myself Alex. At that logic I should die too for doing the same thing you accuse him of. I cut my wrists to die. I jumped off a building to die. I took drugs hoping it would kill me, and when it didn’t I took it again and again to dull the pain, to feel nothing for a while.” I sighed and got up from the grass and started pacing around the tree. “The demon abandoned him, didn’t care if he lived or died. Should I be like the demon? Should I let my personal feelings get in the way of the truth?”

    Alex sighed and pulled me back down with him and I let him; it wasn’t worth the fight. “The Venatori tried to kill you, Nox. They gave you lethal doses of nepenthe. Even Ant is surprised you survived.”

    “That explains the nothingness.” I sighed and pulled out of Alex’s embrace to look at him. I pulled my lips in and I stared at him. The picture rumbled again and I frowned, “I’m sorry I worried you.”

    “You need to wake up Nox. You aren’t angry at them?”

    I shrugged. “What can I do about it from in here? Or even out there.”

    Alex shook his head. “We took you from them.”

    “You what?” I was surprised and shocked and a little bit angry.

    “They were poisoning you, killing you right in front of me. Saying they were trying to wake you up. Sage took over the system and they saw only what we wanted them too. Matt took the magic that was keeping Ant from you and he shadow walked into the room and took you out. Doc says you aren’t out of the woods yet, but the fact that I’m here with you means it’s at least working.”

    “Alex, they’ll hunt you.”

    He nodded. “I know. I took precautions. The kids are all in the Night Life building, so am I. So are you. When you wake up you’ll have to find someplace neutral to live because the wolves and the dragons don’t like you being in vampire control.”

    I smirked. “What did you do Alex?” It was a playful grin as I crawled into his lap to face him.

    “I just did what you would do.”

    “You called in all my chips?”

    “No, I don’t think so. I just warned them. Only Ant, Sage and Matt helped. The rest…”

    I kissed Alex. “You saved me?”

    He nodded and I kissed him again. “I should reward you. I don’t think the nepenthe will allow me much in the real world. I feel it at the edges, the nothingness, but here,” I squirmed in Alex’s lap. “I have all the prowess and more. The power of dreams right?”

    Alex chuckled. “What did you have in mind?”

  • The Dream

    The Dream

    There was an enormous amount of pain, and difficulty breathing in the darkness. And then there was peace, and emptiness and nothing. I remembered the feeling but I couldn’t place, it couldn’t remember. Why couldn’t I remember?

    There was nothing for so long, that when I started to feel again I reached out. My power, my mind. I hadn’t meant to, and the world around me shook. I felt strong arms around me holding me close, and then an unnerving shift and I felt my stomach twist and turn in a thousand directions and I knew I was me. I wasn’t floating in blackness, I felt home. Something had changed but the darkness remained. There was an echo in the distance, I could almost make it out, but it was gone before I could do anything, but I felt safe now. Safer than I had in forever.

    The world around me started to lighten so did the pain. But I still felt like a semi truck hit me. I opened my eyes and blinked at the light. Everything was a blur of color and it hurt to move so I just laid there feeling the lush green grass below me.

    Why was I laying in grass? The thought flit through my mind but was lost on an ebbing of pain. Yet it too floated through my body like nothing. The sky above me was strange. I thought I’d see towering sky scrapers instead I found stars – millions of stars twinkling in odd fashion. If I looked at them too long they looked like they rearranged themselves, speaking words of profound depth, but when I focused on it, I couldn’t hear anything. And I didn’t see anything but the stars.

    I sat up and had to use my arms, it hurt to move, and I felt tire just in that moment. How had I gone from standing completely only using my core body to this? Something was missing, I didn’t even know where I was.

    I turned around and there standing behind him in the middle of a grass filled field was a lone tree standing proud and bare but yet it looked more alive than anything else in the dream. A dream? Was this a dream? “Alex, can you hear me?” I called out. Hell I if I was in a dream I didn’t know how to call him, or how to find him. But even as I thought about the blue eyed man that I loved, I was in front of the tree. Its dark brown bark was aged and withered, but it glowed with an undercurrent, so alive I was afraid it might burn me when I touched it.

    But it felt like bark, like any other tree I’d ever seen. Images flickered around the tree, like images that were shadows on an old school TV screen. And there were other things that sat around the tree like horrible decorations. There was a curled up dragon at the base of the three and when I knelt down to touch it I felt the odd sense that I’d touched Drake. Wrapped around the tree was a ribbon the color of Alex’s eyes. It had seen better days, but it held on, never quite breaking in any one spot. And as I watched it, those ripped and torn spots seemed to mend themselves, like it was knitting back together. It made me smile as I ran my fingers across the silky smooth ribbon, I knew it was Alex. Each image on the tree was someone important to me.

    I found my father in a pedestal that held a trophy – worlds best hunter and hanging from the trophy was a simple elegant Spanish medallion on a golden chain that was polished so bright you could see your reflection in the gold. It was so Dorian. Leaning against the pedestal was a giant silver spoon that reached out for the gold medallion when it swung too close. A small globe spun next to them, but it was the dirt covered rock underneath the globe that was completely Jessie. I lifted it carefully and felt my step-father through the connection. It was strange. I set him next to Marco and Dorian and the world seemed right – happy even. I brushed off the stone with my fingers and I felt nothing when I did it except the roughness of the dirt and stone. There was something etched in the rock and as the words became clear tears fell from my eyes, ‘In loving memory. I love you too.’ Etched along side was an apple pie.

    “Fuck!” I muttered as I fell back against the tree trunk and let the tears flow

    Rain fell from the sky as I cried, but the stars still shone brightly. I couldn’t let the sadness stay as I looked around the dream. I found Michaela’s stone neatly placed next to a pond where fish swam. I couldn’t stoop the tears from flowing. Two monkeys played in the tree tops and even though I knew I couldn’t touch them they were my brothers. Other images flickered in and out, I didn’t know what that meant. I scanned the tree looking for meaning and that’s when I noticed that there were parts of the ribbon around the tree that were red. A thin thread of red was snaked around the tree, when I touched it, it felt like fishing cord, or very thin metal cording, it could cut in an instance, but it was mending the ribbon, tying it together. I knew the red cord was Ant I’d felt the connection when I touched it, but why was it mending what represented Alex.

    I heard an echo again but this time I heard the voice. Come back to me pretty boy. I need you.

    It was Alex. “I’m here.” I called out again. I focused on his voice and tried to go to him. But the world started to burn in the corners like I’d lit the edge of a picture on fire. I let go. “Fuck!”

    Why was I stuck in a dream? And a dream Alex can’t find me. Please find me. I begged. I need you.

    There was a crash of thunder in the distance. The sky started to darken. I wasn’t going to start crying again. But I needed Alex. He needed me. I tried to reach out again, I smelled the smoke in the distance, the fire burning my dream down to the ground. I knew it would be just ash. Alex.

    I felt strength and calmness wash over me and cleanse the pain I was causing myself. Nox. It’s okay baby. You have to stay with me.

    There was a nudge and I stopped reaching and I was content in the strength and love. I knew who it was. I knew Alex was with me. And there was a gentle whisper on the winds Ant’s here too. We got this. The thought that Ant was there worried me, but I just let the feelings carry me away and I laid against the tree. I wouldn’t fight it, whatever happened happened as long as I had Alex.

  • So Here’s the Plan

    So Here’s the Plan

    After Sunday there is likely only 5 more scenes left until the end of this current rewrite. Taking Back Erebus will be officially done with.

    Now comes the question. Do you want to see the bits where Alex has a PoV? They aren’t in the ‘book’ so to speak but AJ wanted to write them so we knew exactly what happened when I wasn’t around.

    While we wrap up the First Vestige, book 3 in this arc so we aren’t posting a book that’s not finished its first draft. It makes for posting easier.

    There are 7 or 8 Alex scenes for ya’ll, that fill you in on what goes down. So next weekend? probably!

    OH and then AJ’s gonna work on a fluff piece that is canon, you will get to see that after the first vestige is posted here!

  • The Fall

    The Fall

    I chased the demon inhabited body to the roof. Garrett stood near the edge looking down. It had been years since I’d been up here. The rush of air against my skin, the lack of oxygen in my lungs, the fucking paralyzing fear coursing through my body with each step I took closer to the edge. It had been years since I jumped, since this place had been my sanctuary. And Garret’s dark eyes stared at me with a smirk. “I can see why you like it up here.”

    “Why do you make me see the same thing over and over?” I asked.

    “B cause this man, this body, what he did to you, when he did it to you has been like ambrosia. Your fear. Delectable,” it said not in Garrett’s voice.

    “How many times the nightmare tried something new, but nothing ever came as close as this. It saddens me you took the ingenious one from me. Taking you away from him was a stroke of genius. And the pain and fear was so much more glorious. But you never break. Stubborn child, but I will have you. One way or another. In the living world or the underworld. You are mine.”

    He spoke like he knew me well and I supposed he did, feeding on my fears. But he didn’t let me think on it with each step closer to the edge we went until his feet hit the wall and he smirked. “I ask of you, dear rising one, what will you choose. Justifiable death, or to save an innocent soul?” He climbed up onto the side of the wall and looked over the edge.

    My breath caught in my throat as the demon took a step off the ledge. It was only a second, but in that second before Garrett plunged to the ground, I saw the demon leave the body, and as that first rush of falling hit Garrett he screamed, “Save me.”

    It was an eight second drop and waiting meant life or death. There was no hesitation as I bolted to the edge and dove over it into a free fall. I heard Alex yelling my name, with Ant beside him. But I had to focus on the 6 seconds I had left. I built the walls around me, thickened the air around myself and Garrett. I slowed the momentum but I raced to him, and I grabbed his outstretched fingers and pulled him to me. Held him against me while I flipped over and softened the incoming ground as we fell. The air still thick around us it was hard to breathe. But gasping for breath was better than death at least that was what I told myself up until the moment we crashed into the ground below. Bone shattering, crushing feeling of all life being pushed from your body. And then there was nothing but darkness…

  • Meet Garrett

    Meet Garrett

    I took Alex’s hand in mine. It was a little possessive but it was more I needed his strength and I needed him to know Ant meant nothing, that it was just the bite.

    It’s nothing, pretty boy. I see it. Hate that he has that effect on you but I know he’s your friend, don’t worry about it. Focus on the asshole in front of you not the ones watching your back.

    I couldn’t help laughing out loud as my train of thought made Alex blush for the very explicit thought I had of him.

    Ant shook his head. “Is this what it’s like living with you two? Get a room.”

    Alex laughed. “We’ll be in line, the fucking room is taken.”

    “Alex,” I chided him but was laughing. Laker and Matt were very into each other. First loves were like that I think.

    “It’s not first love, Nox,” Ant said.

    “Stay out of my head.”

    “You know I can’t. And you project so it’s easier. You know your brothers smell like wolf right? It’s getting stronger every day and every day they are with you it gets even more powerful. I wouldn’t be surprised if they turned early.”

    I stopped dead. “You fucking mean they’ve bonded? That Matt’s family after what, two weeks?”

    “You and your fucking magic, Nox. It messes up everything around you,” Ant said.

    “I’m confused,” Alex said. “How can they be werewolves?”

    I sighed. “We’ll talk about it later, we’re here.” I stopped in front of a door. It looked like every other door on the hall. It looked like every other door in the whole place. But I knew it was Garrett’s without a doubt. I felt his power like a slick slime radiating from the door. I squeezed Alex’s hand tighter and knocked on the door. I felt like I was pushing my hand through sludge but there was nothing there. It was just magic of the place, but this magic tormented me my whole life.

    I heard movement on the other side of the door and so did Ant, he took a step closer to me. I wasn’t exactly sure why he was protecting me, I wasn’t exactly defenceless.

    You are when it comes to Garrett. echoed in my head from two different directions. Alex’s hand was tight in mine and I didn’t know who was holding on tighter. But they were right. I was already paralysed and Garrett hadn’t even opened the door yet.

    The moment I saw his hazel green eyes I felt like I was five again. His whole body smirked at me. “What do I owe this pleasure, Nox?” He didn’t even look at Ant or Alex. Just me.

    “What do you know of nightmares?”

    “Are you accusing me of something?” he asked but I knew he knew what I was talking about.

    “Not a thing,” I said. Though I wasn’t sure if that was fear or the truth talking. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes and centred myself on the voices in my head, on the strength around me. And there was a third feeling one I didn’t understand but I didn’t care, it hummed right along with the rest of my magic. I used all that when I opened my eyes and smiled brightly at the man who had tormented me. “Someone latched a nightmare on to me, I want to know what you know of things like that?”

    “That’s dark forbidden magic – demonic even. Why would I know anything?”

    “The nightmares I had were the same ones you made me see as a child,” I said flatly.

    He reached out to touch my cheek and Ant’s hand was there to intercept. “You will not touch him. Not here, not again. Not ever,” Ant growled and Garrett took a step back.

    “Come in why don’t you three?”

    “We’ll stay right here thank you,” Alex said.

    I hadn’t even budged at the offer, which made Garrett frown. He closed his eyes and shifted his posture, shaking himself. “Enough of this,” he growled. “Why are you here? You know Garrett was the one to command my child.”

    “Why?” I asked.

    “Why, the most powerful person in the known world says. Why break a child who is to become a god? Why break a boy who can find his soul mate? Why break a teenager whose most powerful allies have been alive for centuries? Why break a man who can kill you?”

    The demon had taken Garrett’s body, for how long I don’t know but it’s black eyes gave it away as did it’s words. “Why? Because I can? Because I was told to? Because I enjoy it. Your fears are glorious. And I will have them again. Come a little closer.”

    I took a step, but there were hands keeping me from moving. “There are other ways to break a boy who wants to save the world.” Fire, air, earth and water rose from the demon – a feat Garrett himself couldn’t do. I stood in awe and fear and wonder and I knew my theories were right. I was fucking right. My head was a foggy mess but I saw the bolts of power flow from the demon straight at us. But no matter how hard I tried to clear the fog I couldn’t get the elements to behave.

    It’s all in your head. I heard the thought before a fire blast blew Alex away from me and the other elements took Ant from me. Garrett didn’t throw another attack at me, he ran past me, pushed past me and I had a choice to make. Ant was lying on the ground and I was frantically trying to put the fire out. I’m fine. I heard even through the screams.

    “You are not fine,” I shouted.

    I am. I promise. I got this. It just looks bad. I don’t know what the fuck it is but go.

    I looked at Alex struggling with the fire, it wasn’t squirming or burning and he was definitely not screaming because he hurt, it was hot, but he wasn’t burning. “Fuck! I’ll be back. Ant should wake up soon.” I ran the way Garret had run. “Fuck!” I said even as I took the stairs to the roof. Why did they always go to the fucking roof.

  • The Rest of the Conversation

    The Rest of the Conversation

    “That fucking book burnt me,” Alex said.

    Ant shrugged. “Don’t fuck around it. Nox’s magic gets slightly more fucked up when he’s losing control.” Ant sighed. “Mother thinks that the book is not of vampire origin. She can’t read it. No one really can.”

    “Nox can,” Alex said. I nodded in agreement.

    Ant smirked. “Mother figured that. Alex, stealing it was good and bad. The shit Benji got in, you just got in ten times deeper. I know you aren’t afraid, but you should be. The vampires coming after you and your family are not going to stop because you’re fucking Mors Praetor. They’d like to have him dead too.” Ant looked at me, “What else did you want?”

    Alex growled but didn’t say anything more he’d been ‘dismissed’. His problems didn’t matter, but they did to me. But that was between Alex and I. “I need to speak with Garrett.” Ant sat up in his seat and his fangs dropped in anger and he was in fight or flight mode, it was good he’d had some blood in the coffee, probably not enough, but some. “Alex won’t let me go talk to him. I suspect he would if he were with me, but I don’t want Alex anywhere near him. So if I’m going to put us both in perceived danger my compromise is to have you at my… our side as first line of defence.”

    “So I’m your body guard?”

    I shook my head. “No. My friend, my ally, and someone I trust with my life, and more importantly with Alex’s life.”

    “I’m not more important than you.” Alex smirked. “Just prettier.”

    Ant chuckled. “You owe me.”

    I nodded. “I owe you.”

    “I don’t like this owing thing,” Alex said.

    “It’s a favor for a favor in our world. Money means nothing to me. I’ve been alive hundreds of years, have hundreds of thousands of bank accounts, lives, art, weapons. Nothing but a favor is worth anything to me,” Ant reasured. “I could take it out in blood. But you’re so particularly fond of me not biting your boy that I won’t even suggest it any longer.”

    “But he’s like bacon,” Alex protested.

    “I will deprive myself of the power,” Ant said honestly.

    “I think I’d rather you power up if you are watching my boy’s back. And mine too for that matter.”

    We both stared at Alex. “What? I’m not an idiot. The way he reacted to the mention of your fucking teacher means there is more to this than I know. I’m not an idiot. Power the fuck up and lets go talk to this asshole.”

    Ant grabbed Alex by the shoulder and squeezed. The three of us took the elevator. Ant expanded his presence so it felt a lot more crowded than the three of us. No one got on the elevator with us and no one would as long as Ant did that. It was a handy trick.

    “Why are we doing this in the elevator?” Alex asked.

    “Because I need a distraction, and anyone who sees us will think it normal,” I said. “You are going to need to make sure I don’t collapse Alex. I normally do this sitting down.” Alex only hesitated a moment as Ant took my arm and lifted in to his mouth. It was a gentle prick, but the surge of pheromones and whatever the fucks raced into my body and I was at Ant’s mercy.

    Alex muttered, “Holy fuck!” I buried my face in his neck and bit softly which drew a moan that Alex cut short. He could read me, my body and what was running through my head. The book in the back started to get heated and I tossed it across the elevator.

    Ant dropped my arm and it fell to my side. “Fuck! Sorry.”

    Alex sighed. “That happen every time you bite someone?”

    “Every time,” Ant said. “It’s a small price to pay for never dying. And being able to fit in better than most vampires. I’ll never be like my Dad, but I’m must better off than my Mother.”

    “Why are you always so formal? It’s Mother, or Il Cane, sometimes you’ll call her by her first name too. But never Mom.”

    “You’ve not met Cari,” I said through a lust-filled haze. It was lessening and I hoped it cleared by the time we made it to Garrett’s room. “She’s small and hot and deadly as fuck. But there is not a humorous bone in her body. It’s all business all of the time. And that’s how he was raised. By a sociopathic assassin whose credo is Honor, Duty, Obligation.”

    “No family?”

    Ant laughed. “Family falls under obligation.”

    Alex shook his head. “And an honorable assassin?”

    “Cari lives by honor. She has killed two humans since the massacre?” I asked. Ant nodded. “One was to make Chevalier – he was a rapist and Cari caught him mid act and took his life so she could bind Ryan, Mia and Tony to her for life. If one dies, the rest dies. And the second was Johnathan Alistair Rosendale, or as he goes today Johnny Rose. She made him vampire to save his life. She protects more humans than the humans know. She takes vengeance for those who cannot do it themselves. She is the vampire assassin. She’s the reason why the vampires aren’t as much of a threat as they could be. All the Venatori ever get are little babies who aren’t worth her time.”

    “Both of you talk too much,” Alex said as he grabbed the bag on the floor and we got off the elevator. “Your trick is nice you really need to teach Nox how to do that.” Alex smirked. “Where to?”

  • It’s All Yours

    It’s All Yours

    We wrapped up dinner and Alex and I got dressed to go meet Ant. Alex just looked in the mirror and pushed back his hair. “I should make it a mowhawk. It’s long enough.” He smirked in the mirror. “You think you’d like that?”

    I laughed, “As long as you don’t dye it blonde again you can do anything you want and I won’t get upset.” Alex pushed his hair into spike on top of his head. “How do you make yours stay I don’t see any product?”

    I pulled on a pair of jeans and walked up behind Alex and ran my fingers through his hair. He let loose a small gurgle of pleasure. It wasn’t a moan, more like what Homer Simpson did when he saw dough nuts. I smiled against his neck and pushed a little power into his hair to make it stand on end straight up in a mowhawk like he wanted. “Is that what you want?”

    Alex rolled his eyes, “Do you do everything with your elements?”

    I shrugged. “Sometimes it’s easier.”

    I pulled on another t-shirt and then my hoodie and before I could get it all situated on my shoulders Alex was pushing it back and reading the shirt. “I make cute babies.” He smirked.

    “It’s true, ain’t it?”

    Alex nodded, “Yes. How long can you keep this veil thing in your room?”

    “Forever,” I said.

    “So why don’t you keep one around you all the time?”

    “They don’t move so well. The sound and the other things I’m doing to keep me inside, the magic doesn’t move well. It shifts and can break easily.”

    Alex sighed. “And you don’t like shielding?”

    I shrugged. “I don’t usually have a five year old in my head,” I said grabbing the book and putting it in a backpack so we could take it without drawing attention to it. Alex watched me do it. “It’s not going to bite you,” I said.

    He grinned, “No just burn me.”

    “I’ll save you – forever and always.”

    Alex shook his head. “Come on let’s go.” He grabbed my hand. “Rider watch the kids please since your brother and his boyfriend seem to be enjoying a little one on one time.”

    Rider sighed, “At least they aren’t humping on the couch.”

    Alex looked at me. “Your brother needs that little talk, the one about how waiting can make it better.”

    I nodded. “Maybe I can figure out a way to separate them all so they have their own private spaces. The apartment isn’t meant for this many people.”

    Alex shook his head. “No it’s not. But that’s for another time. We have the prince of darkness waiting. And I know you hate being late.”

    We left via the elevator and Alex had me pulled against him the whole time. Sandy from the gym was there as we rode down and she kept staring at us as Alex sucked on my neck and I let him. He bit hard and I groaned completely forgetting our audience. Alex chuckled in my head. His fingers trailed down my chest and to my crotch, his fingers grabbed my cock through my jeans and rubbed hard. I moaned and leaned my head back, his fingers kneaded me, and his mouth worked against my neck. The girl Rider had fucked stared at us the whole time. And Alex was marking his territory and making it a show. I think it was a lot to who we were going to meet too.

    The doors dinged open and Alex winked at the girl and took my hand and I followed behind him like the good little boy I was. As soon as we were out the doors Alex died laughing, “You are evil.”

    “Me? You had to grab me?” I laughed, “Not that I minded it was a great distraction.”

    “She enjoyed the show and I killed two birds with one stone.” Alex smirked proudly. “Well more than two I think.”

    “You marked me which you love, I smell like you when we see Ant and what else?”

    “I distracted you on the elevator, and I got to mark my territory,” Alex said straight up.

    We walked to the AU building hand in hand. Alex whispered in my ear as we walked. “And you are all worked up so when we get home I can take advantage of it.”

    I was all smiles when we got to the shadows of the AU building and a third party stepped out beside us. “You know I’d almost think the two of you were back together again. Alex.” Ant looked across me to him. “It’s good to see you had a change of heart. Nox. Don’t fuck this up.”

    “Shut up,” I said. “You want some coffee? I have a few things to ask you.”

    “And we had to do it here?” Ant asked.

    “It’ll save time,” I said. “Coffee?” I asked again.

    “Yeah. Alex do you drink coffee at all hours of the day?” Ant smirked. “No, I’d imagine now it’s time to drink something a little stronger.”

    “We could go to the new bar that opened on the third floor,” I suggested. “I can get coffee there.”

    Ant laughed, “Your boy here, once he abstains from something Jesus Fuck don’t try to tempt him with something else. He has maybe two beers now. Nothing harder unless it’s mixed in with coffee or milk with his father.” Ant nodded, “Though I guess it does beat the alternatives. Angel is not very happy he lost one of his best nepenthe users. Even if the mere sell could get him killed, maybe because he could. That kid is still having a hard time adjusting to being a legit vampire and not some blood thug.”

    “Nepenthe?” Alex asked.

    “It’s the only drug on the black market that gets a Venatori high, it can kill a human in small doses so it’s highly illegal to sell to them.”

    “And you’re half human,” Alex finished for me.

    I nodded. “And Venatori so yeah the risk is greater if I’d gotten caught high as a kite on it. Thankfully my go to was to fall asleep and have vivid dreams. The nightmares were especially brutal, but I always remembered waking up from them knowing I’d dreamt of a blue eyed boy.”

    We were already at the coffee shop, Alex had guided us with a smirk. “Coffee is good any time of the day. I’ll go get it, while you two sit and talk. How does the fucking prince of darkness take his coffee?”

    “Ask for a Red Latté.” Ant grinned, “Tell him it’s for me, he won’t flinch or think you are crazy. Chris is a good kid, still can’t believe that he and Andre are really gonna stick it out with Dom. That’s hard to do, fucking werewolves always smell like wet dog.”

    “Dom is good to him. Thanks Alex,” I said pressing a kiss to his lips before he left to grab us all some coffee. I sat down at a table and Ant sat across from me.

    Before I could say anything Ant was leaning back in his chair. “So that ring.”

    “Don’t ask please, I don’t want to have to lie to you.”

    He grinned. “I’m proud of you. Don’t stop there, make sure you keep asking him things, Nox. Your don’t ask, don’t tell policy gets old real quick and I really did mean it when I said don’t fuck this one up.”

    I nodded. “Okay. But can we talk about my love life later. I have a few things important things, to talk to you about.”

    “I feel the book in your bag. Fucking telepath and his schemes. Benji’s here because of vampire business. He’s under my protection. Well actually he’s under yours since some of the vamps after him don’t really fear the son of the hound, but the hound’s Venatori pet yeah that they do. And your boyfriend.” Ant smirked because he knew he was more than that.” He stole the book Cari’s been watching over for millennium right out from under them and they didn’t even know know it. We’ve had to put word out on the street that the telepath that stole the book is under your protection too. Though the one rumor that stuck was that he was your lover. Everyone loves a good lovers quarrel.”

    Alex came back and sat a red cup in front of Ant. “So, your vampire friend doesn’t shield well.” But it was me he turned to. “Do all them serve blood in the coffee?”

    Ant laughed before he took a look drink of his very hot coffee. “Only the ones with the blood red signs. The rest are a bright red.”

    “Everyone I’ve ever seen has that color sign.”

    I smiled. “They realized they have a bigger market and started expanding, but they have to have a vampire population big enough and at least one vampire who’s willing to be a barrista. It’s illegal to sell blood to a human. It’s a whole lot of extra licensing they have to go through.”

    “Holy fucking Christ. Am I really that unknowing?” Alex said.

    “You’re human.” Ant and I said at the same time. But Ant continued, “The book you took, Mr. Kennedy, Il Cane would like to inform you, that it’s yours now. But if you sell it on the black market she’ll hunt you down, kill you and know it will be the last kill she will ever make.”

The Mind of Nox

escaping into reality

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