Conundrum

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Confusing question or problem? While not really a problem or a question I’ve been contemplating this situation. When I say I I’m not actually referring to me – but to AJ. As we share the same mind – I am AJ’s creation after all.

I started off as a minor character – twins actually – my sister Aurora, who is now deceased – Thanks Deigo! Long Story. Anyway, Aurora was likely to be the star and I was slotted to take back seat. I didn’t fall into AJ’s wheel house at the time. But AJ found a place to throw me in and I shone like the star that I was. AJ instantly fell in love. As time went on I grew into myself and we are now here where AJ has many versions of me and my life floating around the interwebs and AJ’s mind.

But that’s not really the conundrum – who’s influencing who in this so-called relationship. I know I’ve picked up a few AJ’s quirks or I’m exaggerations of them. Some things though have bleed into AJ’s subconscious – favorite color? AJ used to say ‘I don’t have one’. Now – orange (before that it was crimson, emerald green, sapphire – all colors I like as well but not my favorite – these were Cari’s preferences).

It makes me wonder where the line is drawn on things – on who is thinking what. It’s not a personality disorder, but I’ve become ingrained inside AJ’s mind. I wish I were my own person – but hey at least I’m not the one paying the bills and having to be the adult here!

Conundrum