I Have Kids

My eyes were dry when the door opened and Alex came out. He was carrying a plate of food and a glass. “Figured you might be hungry.”

He sat down next me and I offered him the opened letter and took the plate. It smelled good, and looked alright. Better than lunch for certain. But looks aren’t always the right reaction, it was a wonderful flavor, mostly citrus which in the dim light of my ball it looked bland. But it wasn’t.

Alex read the letter and was quiet. The only sounds were our breathing and the clink of my fork against the plate. I finished the chicken and vegetables while Alex stared out into space. “Are you upset at me?” I asked.

“Why the fuck would I be mad at you Nox?”

“Be cause it’s a reminder of the sex I was having while I was with you.”

Alex shook his head. “We were just planning on being an item. We were a dream Nox. I was still using sex to get my marks right up until I was in New York to meet you. So don’t think I’m mad you had a life before me.”

“You okay?” he asked.

“I don’t know if I should be happy, or sad, or angry. This is too much Alex. I just want to curl up and die. I won’t, but I just want to stop the roller coaster and get off.”

Alex took the plate from me and pulled me against him. He wrapped his whole body around me and asked, “What do you need from me?”

I shook my head. “Nothing, just this.”

We sat there, me in Alex’s lap, sorta. We were both still on the hard wooden steps, his back was to the pole holding up the porch and I leaned my back against his chest. His arms wrapped around me and his legs pressed tightly against my body, I was wrapped up in my very own Alex blanket. “Thank you,” I muttered.

Alex pressed a kiss to my neck. “Always,” he said.

I leaned my head back against his shoulder, “Do you like being called Z?”

Alex rolled his eyes and I smirked. “My mother called me that.”

“That didn’t answer the question.” I tilted my head against his chin and he pressed closer to me.

“I don’t hate it If I did Kish and Kay wouldn’t call me it.”

“No one likes being on a telepath’s bad side?” I smirked.

“Something like that.” He raised his eye brow. “Why?”

“No reason. I told you I’d find a nick name.”

He laughed, “You plan on calling me Z? Just to confuse the world?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. “Maybe. Kay said my beard was millennial.”

“It is the in thing to do,” Alex agreed. “The well maintained scruff is what all the hipsters are wearing these days.”

I growled under my breath. “Should I shave?” The thought made me shiver. “I’ll look twelve.”

“Doubtful.” Alex ran his teeth along the side of my jaw. “I can see the merits of soft skin.” He rubbed his cheek against mine, “I don’t mind the scruff, though.” Alex’s hands snaked their way under my shirt and he pressed his lips to my ear and sucked on my ear lobe. He whispered, “I don’t mine hair anywhere.” His fingers ran over the smooth skin of my chest. I didn’t shave there, though hair removal was something I was fond of. His fingers trailed down towards my waist, his fingers tracing the line from my belly button down into my pants, “Don’t ever shave here, this is my favorite.”

“Mine too,” I admitted. The quiet night set on us and Alex held me. I was safe, but more importantly I was at home in his arms. It didn’t matter where I was really, just that I was with him. “Thank you for earlier. Telling me how you feel. I’m not going to be able to do any of this without you. I know that’s a lot of pressure, but it’s the truth.”

“No pressure pretty boy. I promise, I’m right where I want to be. No more talking, well one more thing.” He pressed a kiss to my lips and when he pulled back he winked, “So when do I get to meet these kids of yours?”

“Same time I do?” I asked.

Alex chuckled,”You sure you want that?”

“Are you planning on leaving me?”

“You know I’m not.”

I nodded, “Then I’m sure. I’m not hiding the fact I love a man. Anymore than I’m hiding the fact that I’m Magnus or Cesari. It’s part of me, and they will have to deal with it. And if they hate me for it, tough shit.” I grinned.

“You know it would hurt you.” Alex laughed.

The door behind us opened and Jesse spoke loudly still inside, “Thank you for dinner ladies, and thank you for taking care of my place while I’m away. I appreciate it.” Jesse turned and saw us and smiled a little surprised too. “I expected you’d be off in the spare house by now.”

Alex shook his head. “He wasn’t ready to move yet, and I’m not in a rush.”

Jesse smiled. “I’m going to fly up to New York tomorrow, tell the boys, and give them the choice. It’s okay if they stay. I already checked with Dorian, and your father and they’ve agreed to make sure they aren’t living the bachelor’s life with you.” Jesse laughed softly at his own private joke, “Dorian said he’d arrange for them school this next school year. I told him not the Academy.”

“I won’t let them join until they are eighteen.”

The look Jesse gave me said he wasn’t happy. “I suppose I can’t stop them then.”

I smiled, “Which is why I won’t let them until then. But I’m not going to say I won’t teach them about my world. Laker’s dating a teenage Magnus. And they hang out with werewolves. So I’ve got to teach them how to be safe in my world.”

Jesse nodded. “I know. Just no hunting.”

“If I can keep them from hunting I will,” I said honestly.

Jesse clapped Alex on the shoulder, “Take care of my boys. All three of them.”

Alex smiled, “I’ll do my best. Have fun, send us pictures.”

Jesse laughed, “I’ll try, those things seem to hate me.”

We watched Jesse drive off. “You said something about a room away from here?”

Alex pushed me so I’d stand and he joined me. “Come on, I’ll show you to my place out here.”