This sparked images of weddings and since I’m not exactly the typical type guy with typical partners I don’t envision a wedding is in my future. A permanent partner yeah, but I don’t see the whole white wedding and walking down the aisle type thing going on. I’m not inclined to marry a woman…

I want kids. I want a family. I want a loving mate, but I’m fairly sure I won’t find what I want truly in a woman. I could be wrong, but I don’t think so considering women lack a certain body part I happen to really like. But sex isn’t all that it is.

I’ll be honest with you, since it’s one of the things I try to be with myself – self therapy I guess. I want someone to take care of me. Most of my life I’ve taken care of myself, control every aspect of my life just to get by on a day to day basis. Becoming an adult was probably the hardest thing I’ve done. I’ve never truly lived on my own. The Venatori pay my bills, they provide me amble opportunity to eat down in the cafeteria in the AU building. I mean, my father, doesn’t know how to cook. Most Venatori don’t. I taught myself so I could feed myself food I knew where it came from. Control…

I don’t want someone to run my life. But someone to make some of the decisions and relieve me of the pressure of doing it myself. I’m not saying women are weak and can’t do that. But the women I’ve been with have all struck me as wanting their men to take care of them. It’s all part of their make up. How they are wired. Not judging. Not being stereotypical either. I know strong women who would give me a beat down for suggesting such a thing. Both Dae’lin and Mia would have my hide if I ever called them weak. But they aren’t in my dating pool. Neither am I attracted to them in that way.

It truly is not hard to look past the fact that I like women and say I’m mostly homosexual. I fall heavily to that side on the Kinsey scale in terms of the relationship that would suit me best. My sexual experience falls heavily on the other side. 80% of my affairs have been with women.

Funny how this turned into yet another typical post…

Invitation