Flee

The better part of valor! The better part of valor!

The above quote is a favorite. If you’ve ever played Baulder’s Gate Khalid would shout this as he ran away. The quote is a variation on Shakespeare – yeah me Shakespeare!

Falstaff:
To die is to be a counterfeit, for he is but the counterfeit of a man who hath not the life of a man; but to counterfeit dying, when a man thereby liveth, is to be no counterfeit, but the true and perfect image of life indeed. The better part of valor is discretion, in the which better part I have sav’d my life.
Henry The Fourth, Part 1 Act 5, scene 4, 115–121

I’m don’t let my fears make me run away. They do influence me. They do guide me. Someone one said Fear is what makes us want to live. Without fear you’d jump headlong into traffic. It’s the fear of getting hit that keeps us from that fate. I know I’ve rattled on about my fears here before. It’s always something on my mind.

To flee is to retreat. Retreating is a something you do when the odds get rough. But it doesn’t mean you are giving up. I had to learn that the hard way. I don’t like running away – from anything.

Recently I’ve been having to deal with my father. The same father I hated for most of my life. And yet ironically my father was one of my childhood heroes. The quandary for this particular situation is never lost on me. I want to run away from it. I don’t want to have to deal with my feelings. What makes it worse is my father is in a similar boat – happy to live in blissful ignorance. So we stay at a stalemate.

But I’m not going to run away from this.

Flee

9 Replies to “Flee”

      1. And it’s hard to be a father. Don’t know if you have any kids, but the longer I am a dad I experience how hard it is to be one. You want to do everything for your kids but they have to do it all themselves. Sometimes they want your help, but a lot of times they don’t.

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      2. I am not a father yet – one day – soon maybe. I do get it. My father is a good man – strict and loving in his own way. My problem with my father comes childhood assumptions. For 18 years I thought my father abandoned me like my mother. Turned out he didn’t know about me. It’s hard to get over things you’ve been angry about most of your life. I am trying.

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      3. I hope that you can work things out with your dad. It’s nice to have a relationship with your father. My relationship with my dad is not what I would hope it to be, but I know that he loves me very much. I see myself having a lot of the same communication issues with my kids. Thank God they are better communicators than me. If they decide to have kids they will be good dads. I hope that some day you are able to enjoy fatherhood. You seem like a very caring person.

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      4. Thanks. And it’s never too late to start working on relationships. Family is important – that’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned and will pass on to my kids when that happens.

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      5. Nothing really to compare it to really. The Academy was more boarding school than say normal public school. My roommates only saw their parents on holidays. But I wasn’t without a fatherly figure. Dorian was more than just my guidance counselor. He was one of two people who insured all my needs were met. Thankfully my wants never really exceeded my needs.

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