World Lore, Dice Rolls, Tables and Cypher System mechanics (Dropbox Folder)
Was there any place he went that he didn’t make friends? He seemed more than happy to be chatting with strangers — kissing them even. Though he didn’t look like he was going to kiss the man with the robot child thing.
I sat down at a small table waiting for Nox to join me. And when he did he smiled brightly at me. His eyes drifted towards the cake and then back to me like he knew what I had asked the fancy replicator thing for. It hadn’t been on purpose. I just couldn’t stop thinking about him.
For being magically created food the mashed potatoes tasted like something my mom would have made when I was a kid — not at all from a box like I do when I’m home alone. Not that I’m ever home anymore.
Nox cut his steak and weighed the taste as he ate. It was hard to take my eyes off his lips. And he seemed to notice.
“Tell me it’s okay to be gay in the future.” He said with all too smug grin.
“It is. Lots of celebs are out and proud. But I’m not gay.” I said after swallowing the half way decent steak I had just put in my cakehole when he spoke.
“So you just like kissing boys.” He rolled his eyes.
“And girls, and whoever else I take a shine too.”
“Uh huh. But you don’t want to be seen doing so — with boys or whoever else.”
I sighed. “When I started it wasn’t so easy. Its still a stigma. Still something you can alienate the wrong people. Plenty of stars out there who don’t mind being out and proud and flaunting their sexuality. But it’s not mine. Haven’t done the girlfriend thing either. No one really knows who I take to bed at night. Kinda the way I like it.” I diverted the conversation, I didn’t want to talk about this here or now. Or really ever, but he brought it up. “You are obviously out even though it’s not quite so kosher.”
He smiled. “It’s hard to be a male dancer and not be defined as gay to begin with. It has absolutely nothing to do with my career choice, or the fact that I like men. It’s just who I am.”
I could see that. “So you have a guy back home?”
Nox shook his head with his mouth full. But his gaze dropped when he finished chewing and pushed a few green beans around his plate before he looked up and met my eyes with his big chocolate colored ones. “No. I’d never want to have to make someone deal with all my issues. It’s bad enough my Dad had to take care of me for so long. He missed out on a lot in his life because of me.”
“What about your mom? She not around.”
He laughed. “My mother gave me up when I was a baby. She couldn’t afford to care for me with a heart defect. The state found my dad and he took care of me. I never even knew my mom. Didn’t care to even look for her.”
“That sucks.” I said.
We ate in silence for a while. He’d dragged me here so I could feed my ever growling stomach and because I had tried to hide my reaction to comment. “I do want to let you kiss me again.” I said in a hushed whisper. “I just…”
Nox nodded. “I get it. Still in the closet. I said I’d back off.”
“It’s not just that.” I confided. “It feels like everyone is watching.”
He laughed. “We are part of some fucking reality TV program of course everyone is watching.”
I blinked at him. It wasn’t that I hadn’t understood the motivation of my circumstances. I fully accepted that I’d have to play whatever game they set me up for. But this… was this really what I bargained for? To live my life in front of strangers. No fucking way.
I stood up and looked up at the sky, where else was I going to yell? “I’m not doing this! I refuse! I won’t play your fucking game.”
Nox frowned. “Is it so bad? We don’t have to work. We can travel, explore this strange new land.”
I glared at Nox. “I’m done talking to you too.”
“What did I do?” Nox growled.
I didn’t answer him. I sat back in my chair and crossed my arms. I had no intentions of moving or talking or doing anything interesting.
Nox tried to get me to react. But after an hour of trying he gave up and walked away. He had a nice ass. He had a nice everything. I felt a strong sense of loss, a little bit broken as he walked away from me. I almost got up and followed him. But I wasn’t going to play this game. “I’m fucking serious. I’m not playing this game!” I shouted into the ether.
The Mind of Nox 