He doesn’t listen is probably something we all say about someone else. It’s not that they disobey exactly. They just don’t listen. And yes, I’m talking about the boys. Well the youngest to be precise.
Drake is three. He’s testing his boundaries. Which means he’s playing with fire – quite literally and it scares everyone in the house. We don’t have the alarms they do in the AU building so no one’s freaking out on that level, but Drake has a habit of trying to do something and then ending up starting random fires because his control of the elements isn’t that good.
I can’t play with patterns around Drake – he tries to do them. Which can be dangerous. I insist he does it only with me but he’s three… he doesn’t understand.
Matt is helpful in that he squelches most of the fires with a touch to Drake’s arm, but once it’s ignited things around the house we have to use other means. Sage has a fire extinguisher in every room for when he’s alone with the boys. Oddly enough Matt is learning not only to handle his gifts but to actually touch the elements. He can’t do much with it since he tends to cancel them out but he’s making patterns. I think he can reverse anything I do given time. Matt’s excited. Hell I’m excited, it’s new territory and something the Venatori will never learn – which is a shame.
AJ is always finding new music because of 2 Cellos. They did a simple video of Despacito. Awesome version is down below.
So AJ went and looked up the original. We fell in love and it has inspired a scene coming up in The First Vestige. Should be in two Sunday’s I think. It was actually meant to happen before that but I side railed AJ’s plans with my ranting and depression and anxiety. Go me, right? Idiot!
And just because AJ finds it amusing here is a parody of Despacito done by none other than Seasame Street’s Bert!
Sage pulled me off the couch. “Go get ready.”
I sighed. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to go. Ever since Dev left I felt worse. To kill time I went to NYU’s website and looked at all the courses they were offering. But the semester had already started so I could apply but it wouldn’t help my boredom now. I didn’t even have any fucking clue what I wanted to do.
Both Sage and Dev were trying to help me find a path to go. Dev tried to talk me into bartending at Aspect. Sage pushed me to teach a class at the gym. And I had I said I’d try both, but they didn’t have places for me so again I waited.
Sage sighed. “Come on Nox.”
“I’m moving.” I said.
“You could be happy about it.”
“I’m happy.” I said with a faked grin.
Sage rolled his eyes. “Dee has a good night planned. I know we are busy but you’ll get used to this. I promise. Go have fun. Forget your mundane life.” He said mundane with hatred. That was the only thing he didn’t like – the fact that this life bored the living fuck out of me. He was happy I was here all the time. He was happy I lived with him. That I cooked for him. I cleaned for him. He was in heaven and I lived a boring mundane life. I felt like shit and no amount of yoga or working out fixed it. I really should go see Adrian. Or Margo… You know it’s bad when I am almost to that point.
I went upstairs and took a shower and pulled on a pair of blue jeans, a non-sarcastic t-shirt – actually it was one of Sage’s. It still smelled like him and it was comforting when I felt like shit. I wore a black button down over top the black t-shirt with the Avengers written across the chest.
My hair was colored orange and my nails matched. I think redid my nails everyday out of sheer boredom. My hair too. I applied make up everyday, maybe not as thick as I did today but there were parts of me that stuck to my habits. I scratched at the modified tattoo. You couldn’t see the cross swords anymore. It was a chinesse symbol that meant exiled. Very blatent for the Venatori.
I didn’t have nightmares anymore at least not like I used to. My other fears were replaying in my head – the tattoo had me in sweats for a few nights afterwards. But I don’t think it had anything at all to do with the actual tattoo more what it represented. My fear of change. I couldn’t even jump from the AU building. They wouldn’t let me past the Infirmary. My whole fucking life was changed the day I said fuck you to the Venatori.
And I have no one to blame but myself.
I pulled on my leather jacket and headed back downstairs to say night to the boys and Sage. They had pizza for dinner. No telling what I was having since no one would tell me anything. No one really understood the anxiety not knowing caused me. But what did it really matter. I was a ball of nerves anyway.